chapter 56- Why complicated?

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Niall's POV

After seeing Harry staring at me with expectation and kissing with so much passion.. I decided to have him.. I didn't wanna wait even a minute.. But rules were rules.. We needed his clothes.. Like the last time.. So I watched him taking the bag from my hands and going upstairs to our room..

That one single kiss told everything that I wanna know.. He wanted me as much as I wanted him.. He kissed me with a want..need.. He kept looking at my eyes.. like he didn't wanna lose me.. again.. I kept staring at him and he kept staring at me.. Who started that staring thing I didn't have any idea.. but I lovee it.. probably I started it.. because I like his gorgeous green eyes.. a lot....  

When I broke the kiss, Harry was kinda seemed sad.. He wanted more.. I was thinking about eating lunch or something..together.. Paul already made something for us.. But.. naaaahhh.. lunch could wait.. I want Harry.... I couldn't wait any longer..

At that moment, Paul came by myside. Like the last time, he wanted to wait with me to take the bag from Harry and then he would get away.. But I had no intention waiting here with Paul.. I didn't wanna eat lunch either.. So I wanted Paul to follow me to upstairs.. 

When we were at the last stairs, the door was opened. I saw Harry in one of his black suits which I liked the most, I found him so sexy in it and told him that many times before.. When I saw his choice, I was sure he wanted to be with me right now as well.. When he saw me he bite his bottom lip and smile a little.. Was he doing that on purpose? Aghhh...

I just took the bag from his hands and gave it to Paul, Paul took it and went back immediately. Harry was about to go outside of the room, but I pushed him inside gently.. I hit him to the wall and kissed him, he kissed me back immediately..  

At first our kisses were cold and short.. We still kept staring each other, touching each others' faces.. like we wanna be sure that we were both in here.. in this room.. with each other.. and that wasn't a dream. Then I deepened the kiss, wanted access inside his mouth and he gave it.. then I heard his moanings.. I literally live for this voice.. It was like a voice from heaven.. I kinda relaxed when I heard his moans.. 

I took off his jacket, unbottoned his shirt, and he also took my shirt off and quickened our moves. He was impatient as well.. I slided my lips to his neck, found his soft spot and suck there, made him moan more and more.. God, I love his moans.. I didn't realise that I was addicted to that sound.. until now..

I gave hickeys to both sides of his beautiful neck, kinda marked him.. I always liked that hickey thing.. It was like "This guy is mine! Back off, everyone! He has already got a bf " kinda thing.. But now.. it was more like "U are mineeeeee!!!!! Don't ever forget that! ".. Harry seemed like he enjoyed those..he just threw his head to the other side and opened his neck more to me.. and he moaned in the process..and one of his hands was touching my chest up and down.. the other one was laying on my waist..pulling me to himself more and more.. 

After kissing and touching other like a lot.. I got him and myself undressed.. then I laid him down to our bed.. Seeing him in white sheets.. hir curls were everywhere.. in a mess.. his green eyes just locked into mine.. waiting me to thrust in him.. these were all.. just priceless.. 

I just put his legs to my shoulders, leaned in and kissed him once more and at that moment trusted in him.. I trusted in him more and more and my trusts got harder and harder by time.. I was holding myself, trying to not show that I was enjoying this too much.. I should just be angry to him.. but I felt like I could chuckle any minute.. 

Harry was trying not to moan so much either.. probably it was because I was silent.. But I didn't want him to be silent.. I missed his voice.. I wanna hear it.. as much as possible.. So I started to touch him..kiss him..lick him.. everywhere.. more and more.. And he started to moan louder than before.. Yeahh babe.. moan..for me..He kept sayin "Ahhh..Ahh..Ahhhhhh.." That was so f.cking perfect... I missed him so much..

After the sex, I watched Harry for a while.. brushed his hair.. He was under my arms.. where he was supposed to be.. where he belong to.. He was with me.. in my..our bed.. Now I wanted to see him in bubbles.. and use that stupid body lotion thing.. So I got up from the bed and reached out to his hand.. and he immediately took my hand.. We went in the bathtub.. I pour the lotion to our hands.. and then I remembered the times we had sex here.. and sighed a little..

It was enough for the first day.. He just turned back to the mansion.. I had no intention to go 2nd round.. But I couldn't help and touched him a little.Then I started to lean in and kissed him, he kissed me back immediately.. I groaned a little.. I loveee this stupid lotion thing more than I should.. I could feel my hands sliding so easily to every part of my Harry.. one minute my hands were in his shoulder, the other minute they were on his hips.. His skin was so soft.. ahhhhhhhh.. I moaned a little.. and I noticed Harry smiled a little to that and bite his bottom lip.. He started to push his hips towards mine.. Oh God.. He was enjoying this as much as I do..

I pulled myself back a little..I didn't wanna make a move..We just had s.ex and that should be enough for both of us.. If I kept touching him, I could go round two, and I shouldn't do that..Then it became so silent.. and I noticed tears in Harry's eyes..He should remembered our times here as well.. And when I was looking at him..I noticed I had tears in my eyes as well.. He was looking at me like he was saying "I am so sooo sorry..OMG How could I do that to u?". He had that puppy eye expression.. He was so adorable.. 

After the bath, Paul came and brought us lunch.. We ate our lunch in silence.. Then Paul came back to take the dishes and said that he put Harry's clothes to the 'cupboard'. Suddenly, anger boiled inside me.. when I heard the word 'cupboard'.. I wanted him to make a fire outside, under our room.. I dragged Harry to the window.. I went mad..at that moment.. Harry was shocked and didn't get what was going on..

I kinda..didn't want to give him a chance to escape from me again.. I wanna burn all his clothes.. He was mine!!!!  He shouldn't go anywhere.. he shouldn't leave me.. ever again.. I was out of control.. So I just stormed out..left the room without saying anything..

When I went downstairs, Paul was looking at me with questioning eyes, "I want to burn them all" I said, Paul was surprised but nodded anyway.. We took the shopping bag and went outside.. I threw first his pants, then his tie, his shirt, his socks, his shoes.. Then I saw his father's watch and mother's necklace.. "F.CKKKKK!!!!!!!" I said loudly.. That made jump a little..

I looked at the window, and saw that Harry was crying..  I couldn't throw these to the fire.. What was I thinking? If he wanna escape, he would escape with or without these damn clothes.. I gave the watch and the necklace to Paul. I thought.. he would took only these and run away the next time.. THE NEXT TIME?.. 

The realisation hit me one more time.. there will be a next time.. right? Harry wouldn't stay with me forever.. he wouldn't be by myside til the day I died.. I just felt like I would not able to hold myself anymore.. And I didn't wanna have a break down in front of Paul, Hank, or Harry.. So I just took off..

I just went to the beach that I love so much.. that relaxed me a lot.. But even here.. reminded me... Harry.. our picnic in here.. He was everywhere.. Everything reminded me him.. I thought going somewhere else.. but whatever place I thought about.. I remembered a thing about Harry in there.. So after crying a little more.. I decided to go to Dublin pub.. and drank a little.. then turned back to the mansion..

When I went back to the mansion, Harry was so curious about but couldn't ask me anything.. He was still quite, he didn't wanna make me mad.. He knew me so well.. It was sometimes so scary.. He knew I could go mad if he says a wrong thing.. so he just be quiet until I went back to normal.. 

Harry waited me to explain what was going on but I didn't say a thing.. Then we ate dinner together and after dinner,he just went to bed.. When he was angry or curious, he couldn't sleep, I knew that.. But I didn't wanna explain a thing to him right now.. So I went in bed as well.. 

Of course,Harry couldn't sleep, and I pretended to sleeping. I wondered what would he gonna do. He started to walk back and forth inside the room first.. Then took his big teddy bear and hugged it.. and he started to cry.. I felt terrible.. He was in the same mood as me probably..

I knew he love me.. as much as I love him.. God.. Why everything was so complicated.. WHY??..

 

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