Joe Sugg | Imagines

Anxious

You and your friends are all having a sleepover. One of your friends thought it would be a good idea to invite another group of people who happened to include Joe...your crush. Only your best friend knew about your feelings for him and she shared your excitement before his group of friends arrived. Most people were wearing thick layers of make up and skinny high waisted jeans and crop tops. All of your friends looked so good but you couldn't help but feel you were the odd one out. You weren't confident about your body and having a bunch or gorgeous friends didn't exactly help. After about 20 minutes of waiting in the living room the door bell rang. Your friend who was the host went to answer the door whilst you sat on the living room floor (all of the sofa space had already been taken up). The boys came through the living room door and you instantly looked down at your phone, not wanting to make eye intact with any of them. Especially not Joe.

As the night went on you'd managed to come away from your phone and actually talk to some of the boys but you'd avoided Joe all night. You felt your phone buzz in your pocket mid conversation. You pulled it out and read the text from your best friend.

Katy:
Have you noticed that Joe have been staring at you all night??

You:
Shh no he hasn't don't be absurd!!!!

Katy:
I honestly promise you he has.. Please talk to him!! Like!! Right!! Now!!

You:
I don't know, I can't just go up to him I'll get to nervous..

Katy:
Well I have an idea.. Give me a minute! X

You looked up from your phone and glared at Katy, not knowing what the hell she was about to do.

"Right everyone lets put on a film and order pizzas I'm so hungry!" She shouted. Everyone nodded their heads in agreement to her idea. A film was put on the television screen and dozens of blankets were brought down from upstairs. You found the cosiest blanket and sat in the corner of the sofa.

"Hey, I was gonna sit there.." Joe smiled playfully.

"Oh, I'll move, I'm sorry." You said, picking up your blanket, standing up, about to move to find a different space to sit.

"No no it's okay, maybe we could share the seat?" He asked you, placing his hand on your shoulder. You glanced down at it quickly and then looked back up at him.

"Yeah sure, if you want to.." You replied sounding hesitant. He smiled softly and plopped down in the corner, patting his hand directly next to him signalling you where to sit. You sat in place of where his hand was only a few seconds ago. You unfolded the blanket and placed it half over you, offering the other half to Joe.

"Thanks Y/n," he mumbled as he covered himself with the fuzzy material of the blanket.

You noticed the film had already stated playing when you finally started paying attention to the screen, but that wasn't for long. You felt Joe's arm snake under your waist and he placed it on your waist under the blanket. You turned to smile at him and he smiled straight back at you. You stayed like this for a while until the pizzas came. Everyone got up and walked to the kitchen. But you hung back a bit.

"Y/n are you coming?" Joe asked you cautiously.

"I will in a minute I just need to check my phone, I think I've got a missed call." He nodded and made his way to the kitchen along with everyone else. You didn't want to lie to Joe about the reason you weren't coming to eat dinner. Sometimes, you just didn't like eating. Especially when you were nervous or anxious. You knew it was bad but you couldn't help it. You knew if you did eat you'd be sick and you didn't partially want Joe to see you throwing up tonight.

Within 5 minutes Katy came into the living room with a glass of water.

"Here you go." She said, handing the glass to you. She knew how you got when you were nervous but she didn't pressure you to eat. She'd tried that before and it didn't work too well so now she knew to leave you for a bit, at least until you were less anxious.

"Thank you," you replied gratefully, taking a sip of the cold water.

"How it's going?" She whispered.

"Good, I think!" You whispered back.

You and your best friend continued talking until everyone came back into the living room. Including Joe.

"Did you not eat anything? Oh my god are you hungry? I'll go and get you something, I should have saved you some.."

"No no don't worry, I wasn't too hungry anyway. It's fine." You smiled nervously. Hoping he wouldn't catch on to how on edge you felt. Even talking about food made your stomachs churn.

"Are you sure?" He asked, making sure.

"Yep, of course." You replied, but as you said it you started to feel incredibly faint and shaky. You knew this feeling too well. You made a weak attempt to breath in and out slowly but even your breathing started to become shallow.

"I'm really tired, I'm going to lie down upstairs.." You trailed off your sentence as you got up and walked over to the staircase. Joe called after you, clearly confused about what was happening but you couldn't turn around because that would only make you feel 10x worse. You tried to find a spare room but it was proving difficult when your head was spinning like crazy.

Once you'd found a room with a single bed in the corner you walked over to it and lay down. Closing your eyes and breathing deeply was a lot easier up here.

You must have fallen asleep because you woke up to someone softly shaking your shoulder.

"Y/n?" It was Joe. Although you were startled to see him at first, you felt no where near as anxious as you did before.

"Sorry, how long have I been here?" You asked sleepily.

"About 2 hours, everyone's still up but I came to check on you.

"Thank you Joe, I'm fine now i promise. I'm sorry about earlier it's just I.." You paused, not knowing whether or not to explain to him about your anxiety. You didn't have to think too much though.

"It okay, I understand. It happens to my older sister sometimes." You were surprised at what he had just said and he could tell by the look on your face.

"I'm not trying to jump to any conclusions, I just meant I've seen the same thing happen to my sister so I didn't want to follow you earlier when you came upstairs. I guessed you probably wanted to be alone for a while."

You nodded. It was very rare to find someone who understood without personally knowing what it's actually like.

"I can go back downstairs if you want.."

"I'd prefer if you stayed up here." You replied firmly. You pulled the covers and wriggled over slightly so he would be able to lie next to you. He climbed into the single bed and turned to face you whilst pulling the covers back over the two of you.

"I'm here if you need to talk, about anything. You know that don't you?"

"I do now." You smiled and moved your head onto his chest.

"I'm glad I came tonight Joe." He whispered, putting his hand in your back.

"Me too."

BY: crushthoughts on tumblr