Hate

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"Come onnn babe, it'll be fun!"

"Yeah right Joe, getting loads of mean comments is totally my idea of fun..."

"What makes you think we're going to get a bad response? It's just a QnA!"

"I never said "we", Joe, I'm the only one who's gonna get hated on" you sighed. When you met Joe at a friends' party, you didn't know he was a Youtuber. But apparently, Joe knew Lewis, one of your best friends at university, and he introduced the two of you that night, thinking you would be a good match. And he was right: you instantly clicked. You were nothing alike; he liked wearing sweatpants all the time, listening to rap music and he stayed in his house most of the time, you were more of an adventurous person, always going to explore some new place, and grime music was the last thing you'd listen to, given the choice. You weren't into the same TV shows, you were a cat person when he was a dog person, and so on. But it turned out you had the same kind of humour, and that was enough. That and, to be fair, his good looks.

"I don't see why you'd get hate, you're perfect Y/N". You gave him a half-hearted smile. That was the strange thing about you and Joe's relationship: you both deeply thought the other was out of your league. It was like he couldn't see all that you hated about yourself, and it could get frustrating at times. Surely, he had to see it, right? That you didn't have the longest legs, that your thigh gap wasn't big enough, and everything else that you hated about yourself? Or maybe love actually was blind. But you loved him more than you hated yourself, so you accepted to be on his YouTube channel for the first time.

You would only feature in the video for a minute or so, the QnA wasn't dedicated to your relationship, you were hoping that if you announced it in the middle of the video, people would focus on other aspects of the video, not just on you. So you filmed your part of the video with Joe, almost shaking in fear but trying not to let it show. The hard part came after he finished editing it and you had to press "upload". You were standing beside him when he did it, and then turned to you. He had the brightest smile, and bent down a little to place his lips on yours. He seemed genuinely happy, so you kissed him back lovingly.

You went to the living room to watch some TV while Joe started to record with the other guys, as you had decided not to check out the comments on the video, but after an hour of ignoring your phone constantly vibrating with Twitter notifications, you finally gave in and opened the app.

You regretted it instantly.

The few nice comments about you and Joe's relationship were drowning in all the hate you were receiving. Comments about your smile, your hair, the way you did your makeup. They hated everything you already hated about yourself, and added new insecurities to your list. You sat there for a while, staring at your phone. You felt like crying, but the tears wouldn't fall. There was this huge ball of sadness trapped in your chest, and you couldn't get it out, you couldn't breathe normally either. You knew what was happening, it had happened before. You also knew some fresh air would help you calm down, so you rushed to the front door and stepped outside, letting the wind slam the door shut. It was raining but you didn't care, if anything it was helping you cool down.

You didn't hear him come downstairs but suddenly the front door opened and you were in his arms, and that's the moment the tears that wouldn't come earlier chose to fall freely from your eyes, staining both your cheeks andJoe's hoodie. You didn't have to say anything, he'd guessed what was wrong the moment he heard the door slam from his room; at first he didn't say anything, he just rocked you back and forth softly. When he did speak, you could hear the smile in his voice.

"You know my sister texted me like ten minutes ago? She said she'd just watched my new video, and that she really didn't know how I, and I quote, managed to pull such a beauty. Also said I should bring you to the next family reunion so she could steal you from me."

You let out a strangled laugh, warming Joe's heart. He couldn't stand seeing you unhappy, especially when he thought it was his fault.

"I don't care about what some jerks hiding behind a computer screen have to say about you. My friends love you, my family will love you, and God knows I've never loved someone as much as I love you."

You looked up and grinned at him. You knew people were going to keep sending you this type of comments, and you knew it wouldn't be easy to cope with them. But you also knew there was strength in unity, and with Joe beside you, you felt invincible.

BY: stellaverage on tumblr

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