Afraid || Sirius Black [1]

113

"what the fuck?!"

Madison leaped off of Marlene's lap and stumbled backwards. Her breathing was deep and her eyes wide.

"Maddie?"

The brunette shook her head. "That was wrong! That was so wrong! I'm with Sirius! I shouldn't have done that!"

Marlene looked hurt, she thought from Madison's initial reaction that she wanted it, that she wanted her, but she guessed she was wrong. It was all too good to be true. She had nothing on Sirius, the ladies man who everyone wanted, including Madison.

Madison passed back and forth, tugging at the roots of her hair. Her eyes filled with tears at what she had done. She hadn't just broken Sirius' trust, she had broken her promise to Regulus. She had hurt Sirius.

"Didn't you want that?" Asked Marlene quietly.

Madison looked over at Marlene in shock, "No? Yes? I don't know! All I know is that I love Sirius and that should not have happened!"

"Then why did it?"

Madison groaned, "because I'm foolish and stupid! I have to tell him..."

Marlene stood up and grabbed Madison's hand, "no you don't. This could be our little secret." She stepped closer to Madison, a suggestive look in her eye as she ran her over hand down Madison's side, holding gently onto her waist.

"No. I have to tell him. I love him so much and now that's ruined. Leave me alone, Marlene." Madison stormed out of the kitchens. She hated the fact she did want it. She hated the fact that she had hurt one of the most important person in her. She hated herself.

Arriving back at the tower she told the password and in the common room, everyone sat once again.

"Maddie? Where did you go?" Sirius asked her upon catching sight of the girl.

Madison froze briefly before heading straight towards her boyfriend and dragging him up to his dormitory.

"Kinky," laughed the boy adjusting the shirt her wore.

Madison shut the door, locking it and muttered "muffliato".

"Maddie? What's going on?" Sirius asked her after she didn't join him as he sat on his bed. Instead, her hands shook and her eyes filled once again with tears. Sirius saw this. "Maddie?"

"I'm so sorry," she cried, the tears spilling down her cheeks.

Sirius jumped up and stood right in front of her, his hands on her waist. "Maddie, why are you sorry? Baby, what's going on?"

"I'm sorry, I'm so terribly sorry. I don't deserve you. You shouldn't have me. I'm so sorry."

Sirius was very confused. The boy, technically now a man, furrowed his eyebrows and shook his head.

"You should break up with me. Do it. Hurt me. I deserve it." She told him, her eyes meeting his and he saw that she was in fact being serious.

"Why? What's gone on?"

She looked away from him. Stepping back from his hold. "I kissed her."

"Who?" Sirius asked, yes he was annoyed, but at the same time he was curious.

"Marlene."

He bit his lip, "did you want it? Or was it a spur of the moment thing?"

"I wanted it. Because of the situation."

"So it was a spur of the moment want?"

Madison nodded her head. "Now break up with me."

Sirius shook his head, "I'm not letting you go that easily. Unless, you want to leave me for Marlene. Then I will let you go."

"I want you, Sirius, I want you so much. I love you but I don't deserve your love because I was not loyal."

Sirius stepped forward and she stepped back. He moved closer and she stepped further away. Her back hit the door and Sirius closed her in, his arms either side of her. "Then have me. A mistake happens. I know I have been distant and no doubt she has told you why. I can see it in your eyes. You're angry at me because I didn't tell you. I just want you to be safe and not have to worry about things like that."

"Then let me fight and I won't worry."

"It's not my choice, Maddie. I will forgive you for the kiss with Marlene if you forgive me for keeping you away from it all." Sirius said quietly, his lisp dangerously close to her face and his hot breath licking at her skin.

Madison nodded, "I really don't deserve you, Sirius Black. You're too nice to me."

"I know good people when I see them. I also know what it's like to make mistakes, especially in relationships. And you Madison Parker, have not done as worse as what I have done in my life time." He dipped his head done and pressed a kiss to her lips, a short, tender kiss, "and you're mine, Marlene should know that by now."

Madison's hands sat on his waist, balling up part of his band shirt in her fists as she and he kissed again. There was no denying that her kiss with Marlene was great but it would not ever be able to compare with the feeling she gets from kissing Sirius Black. He was the one she loved and wanted to love for the rest of her life. Marlene McKinnon was simply a crush that would pass by.

Sirius was a like a drug to her and she was addicted to him and his love and his touch and there was no rehab that could fix this.