Steve's Diary

July 1, 2014

Dear Diary,

After all that insane action going on, I got word of what was going on with Nick- that they were working on his wounds and that I definitely had to go see him and see if he was doing alright.

I kinda just wanna sleep, seeing as it's 1 o'clock in the morning already but, it's fine. I have to check on Nick.

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I was allowed in the viewing room for the surgery because, well, S.H.I.E.L.D. knows someone everywhere they go and since I work for them, I get special access.

I stood at the glass window and leaned on the ledge there, looking in at Fury on the table and the multiple scrubbed in doctors all around him. After about 15 minutes, Natasha came running in and stood on my left, looking in as well.

"Is he gonna make it?" she asked me, seeing as I'd been there longer and I was there for the attack.

"I don't know," I replied honestly. It got silent for a moment.

"Tell me about the shooter," she whispered.

I felt my body twinge as his unblinking, expressionless blue eyes popped into my mind yet again. It seemed as though the attack was years ago in my head, though, it had only been about an hour.

"He's fast. Strong," I looked down, closing my eyes, seeing him again. "Had a metal arm."

I looked at Nat's reflection in the mirror and she seemed... odd. It was like she knew something I didn't and it was written clear as day across her face.

Maria Hill approached and stood next to her, to which we both stopped talking about the mystery man. "Ballistics?" she asked Hill.

"Three slugs, no rifling. Completely untraceable," she relayed to the two of us.

"Soviet-made," she said, allowing me to realize why she had seemed so- shellshocked.

"Yea," Hill agreed, looking at her.

I heard the nurses start talking to one another as the monitor started beeping. "He's in V-tach," one said aloud.

"Crash cart coming in," another announced.

"Nurse, help me with the drape," the doctor requested.

"BP's dropping," the one nurse called out urgently.

"Defibrillator!" the doctor yelled out. "I want you to charge him at 100."

"Don't do this to me, Nick," Natasha whispered to herself as we watched them all struggling to keep him alive.

The doctor approached him with the defibrillator, "stand back. Three, two, one. Clear!" They shocked him, I watched his body jolt on the table. "Pulse?"

"No pulse," a nurse answered.

"Okay, 200, please," the doctor requested. "Stand back. Three, too, one. Clear!" His body jumped yet again. "Get me epinephrine! Pulse?"

"Negative."

"Don't do this to me, Nick. Don't do this to me," Natasha murmured again.

I started to walk towards the door when they called it. "What's the time?" the doctor asked.

"1:03, doctor," a nurse replied.

"Time of death, 1:03 a.m.," the doctor announced. I walked out.

Later, they brought me and Natasha into a room with Nick's body. She stood over near him, while I stayed agains the wall, holding the flash drive he'd given me in my hand.