RM , A Backstage Romance Book 2 In The Series

acceptance

They were probably the longest 10 minutes of Rose's life , she didn't try to reach out for him , she barely breathed , all she could do was watch as a myriad of emotions crossed his face. If it wasn't so serious it would have almost been comical .

His face was so expressive , but still she didn't know for sure what was going on inside his mind. She wanted to be invisible, so she sat like a statue and waited.

Father ? abeoji...? Dad ? Appa...?

He had thought he wanted children in the past , but as he had got older he had pretty much accepted that he was going to be married to the group for life ..back when he had been a day dreamer he had imagined the women he loved saying we're having a baby and how he would take her in his arms and be so happy ... what an idealistic , nieve immature child he had been .

His brain did the math and realised he would barely get to see the baby takes its first steps before he would have to enlist.. not that that was important right now but there were so many thoughts in his head at the moment that he had to try and solve them one at a time.. his parents ! What would they think. ? They were quite reserved and traditional, had initially wanted him to become a business man like his father . Actually his mum might be happy.. both his parents , but his mother especially had been sad when he had said he wouldn't marry and have children, although they probably would prefer a nice Korean girl.

Bang!! They'd only just come out of the Taekook scandle and now he was going to What..? marry an English girl , break a million Korean Army's hearts , ?
His group brothers !! The tour !! Would he still go on tour , how could he not he couldn't let everyone down he still had a job to to do.....It seemed all too much right now to take in but just as he was feeling the most overwhelmed he caught Rose's eyes.
She seemed to be as scared as he was .. yet she had been willing to carry the burden on her own. She didn't expect anything of him , which was a bit sad he thought.

Then one clear thought penetrated the mayhem in his mind... He loved her ! No question...He had already decided he couldn't be with out her before knowing about a baby.., so he had obviously been thinking about fighting for her , them all along.

From searching for her to inviting her to come stay with him, he had been willing to take the risk for them.. and she loved him !. A tiny seed if doubt came to mind , was she just saying that because of the baby ? ..no! He'd felt her love even if he hadn't acknowledged it before ..

He took her hands in his and sat next to her on the sofa...they were cold as ice , he didn't have the answers but knew the answer wasn't being separate..

Rose looked down at his hands holding hers , did she dare to hope ? Or was he about to let her down, she felt tears form and no matter how much she willed them away they slowly fell down her face. He used one of his hands to gentle rub a tear drop away.

There hadn't been a single moment when he had thought to leave her alone in this , he may be shocked but he would never shirk his responsibility.

" I love you ... and I'll love our baby too " he said , solemnly, " You're not alone Rose " he pulled her into his arms and she cried all her fears and worries out on his shoulder.

All he could do was just hold her and stroke her hair reassuringly , her whole body shook as she cried.. it broke his heart to think about how scared she must have felt ... Eventually she quietened , and it wasn't long before her breathing became steady and relaxed and he realised she'd fallen back asleep. He went to grab the blanket that had fallen to the floor but she held onto him tightly and mumbled his name again.

He wasn't surprised., over 14 hours traveling , the emotional stress built up from the last week and being pregnant... of course she was tired .

The evening hadn't gone as he had maybe hoped and imagined, but as he maneuvered himself to lay next to Rose on the sofa , her head now on his chest with her arm wrapped around him, he felt a calm , an acceptance, and even maybe excitement for the future.

He spent the next few hours going through conversations in his head .. with his parents, his brothers , Bang, Army ..he needed to be calm . He needed to be confident .

He looked at Rose and wondered what she would look like pregnant , would they have a girl or a boy , suddenly a future he had long given up imagining was before him and he found himself smiling. He picture his child with 6 uncles spoiling them , he wondered if they would be arty like their mum or smart like him .

He fell asleep smiling.

Nausea woke Rose , the familiar mouth watering and lump in her throat. She tried to move but couldn't, she opened her eyes , she was wrapped tightly in Rms arms , if the sickness wasn't starting to seriously get her attention she would have been in heaven right night... she wretched and had to physically almost push hin off her and run to the bathroom .

He woke with a start and nearly fell on the floor as Rose clamboured over him and disappeared down the hall.

He got up to follow her and went straight over to hold her hair for her and rub her back. He made soothing noises until the sickness passed.

" is there anything I can get you ? " He said feeling helpless

She wiped her mouth with some tissues and in a desperate voice said " my mums ginger nut biscuits ?"

Panicked he had no clue what they were but stored the name away for further investigation.

" what about some ginger tea ?" He asked hopefully. She nodded weakly and stood up. He made sure she was OK on her own and went to put the kettle on.

After flushing the loo and rinsing her mouth at the tap , she went back into the sittingroom somewhat embarressed .

Rm handed her the hot tea and watched as she took a sip. " are you okay now ?" He asked

She nodded and said "thanks , I'm just sorry you had to see that ..again " she added remembering this wasn't the first time he'd helped her .

" Rose , please don't be embarressed or apologise, its my fault youre pregnant , you are not in this alone !"