RM , A Backstage Romance Book 2 In The Series

almost show time

She couldn't sleep. RM had had to go back to the studio and she was left alone in the room. Alone with her thoughts and worries, she'd had a bath and she'd managed some noodles and she thought about ringing her mum but realized the time difference wouldn't make that possible.

Instead she settled for a very long message for her sister to read when she woke up. She open her phone and settled on the floor on a cushion , she missed her bean bags..then remembered she still had them at her flat ! Ignoring that subject for a later time she opened messenger and started to write.

'LILLY!!!!!!!!, she wrote ' I don't know what to do :(.... I'm so nervous and by the time you read this my show will be starting. I wish you were here with me . I should be looking forward to it. I earnt this !! sigh..

When I came back over here I got in touch with the baby's father just like I said I would , but he's not an ordinary person!! I really don't want to say who he is especially via text so I'll tell you when I see you next, you're just going to have to trust me, he's a very good person, and I do love him..

Good news is he's going to stand by us and help us and be there for us ....but ....Lily!!!!...he wants to marry me!!!!!! Sis... I never thought I'd get married! Like do I look like the marrying kind, If you were a future mother in law would you want me ?

I can almost feel myself shaking just thinking about it ..like I know it's the right thing for the baby and me I guess , however the baby's dad isn't a normal person like I said... he is so far in the limelight that when the world finds out everyone is going to hate me or be jealous of me but even scarier than that he wants me to meet his parents.

He's invited them to the exhibition tomorrow I don't know anything about them I've tried Googling them I know his dad is a businessman and his mum loves him and is probably very lovely but they're going to hate me ! :(:(:( I'm not Korean for a start, Im English.... I got pregnant out of wedlock I'm certainly not going to move in with them and become the dutiful stay at home daughter-in-law. Sigh ..

Okay sis, Rant over, sorry for the long txt .. wish you were here for real , could use a hug but go give my niece a cuddle and kiss from me, love to mum and ill speak to you soon ..loves ya.'

Well that had taken maybe half an hour, what to do with the rest of her evening? She needed to keep busy .
She stood up and stretched and went to make herself a lemon drink. The ginger was helping but fresh lemon in warm water was nice too sometime,. on the counter in the kitchen she saw a pile of papers and remembered Rm had said they were a list of professional caregivers, from nursing to midwives , she had meant to look at them earlier but although she could speak Korean fairly well, reading and writing was still a struggle so she would wait for Rm to help her with these she thought , leaving them be.

By 9 pm, she had sorted her clothes for the show , had a bath and got into a set of fluffy pyjamas. She was starting to really miss her clay, her hands itched to get creative. She pulled her note book out, maybe she could finish Rms set and give it to him as an engagement present , she thought...but an hour later her sketchbook had nothing new in it.. married kept circulating round in her brain, meeting his parents , his parent's hating her ,

At one point she felt so overwhelmed by everything that she had a little cry but then quickly pulled herself together. For the sake of her baby she should try hard to be happy and have happy thoughts and only see happy things... or so she had read on wiki when she'd looked up what was expected of pregnant Korean women... She wished she hadn't if she was honest, she wasn't used to feeling insufficient .

It was getting late and she was feeling tired. She didn't think for one minute she was going to be able to sleep and she wished Rm was home. Everything made sense when he was with her , it was only when she was lost in her own thoughts did she feel like this.

She finished and washed her cup up and then made her way to bed.
In the darkness she cuddled his pillow with one hand and talked to her baby.. for all of her worries one thing was sure. This baby would be loved. She cradled her tummy with her free hand and told her baby how loved they would be and spoke of her family and his .

This was how Rm found her when he got home. One hand on her tummy and the other holding his pillow. His heart felt like it literally swelled at the sight and he knelt by the side of the bed just watching her for a while.

He would make this work ! He whispered out loud to the universe. He had always made what he wanted to happen happen , through sheer hard work , determination and will. He'd wanted to be a rapper, with his mums encouragement he'd done that , he'd wanted to be part of the biggest group in the world , he'd done that too, now he wanted to be the best father and husband.. something only a few months ago he would have thought ridiculous. Yet now it was something he wanted more than anything else in the world.

Every hurdle he would have to jump he would , every obstacle in his way he would move..nothing was going to prevent him from getting what he wanted, and what he wanted was a family with Rose.

He placed his hand on Rose's tummy , he let his little finger sit over hers, the rest of his hand splayed out . He couldn't wait to see and meet his baby .

" salanghaeyo jagiya " he whispered.