Once Upon Online

chapter 23

4 months in total have gone by since I last talked to Ryujin. I still miss her like crazy. I still don't know why she hasn't messaged me back. Maybe she never really had feelings for me like she said she did.

I still stream from time to time but I'm slowly trying to stop. It's not my thing but Dana keeps begging me to do it. I finally agreed to let him do his YouTube channel with his friend so he would leave me alone

Jessica and I have gotten a lot closer. She helps me not miss Ryujin so much. I'm still confused why I miss Ryujin. I keep telling myself that I miss her friendship but sometimes I would catch myself staring at her pictures. I don't think that's normal if you miss someone's friendship. Do I actually like her? If I do, am I willing to be with her? If we do end up together, would Eva be okay with having two moms?

I shake my head to clear those thoughts. We're not even talking and I'm thinking about her being a possible mom to Eva. There must be something really wrong with me.

I suddenly get a message from kik so I get excited thinking it was Ryujin but I become sad right away when I see it's just Lia. I feel weird sometimes talking to Ryujin's ex but she's the only I know that's close to Ryujin.

If Ryujin decides to talk to me again, then I'll ask for other contacts in case something happens to her. I don't want to be in the dark. I don't want her to die suddenly and I'd have no way of knowing.

Liayah: Ryujin is back.

I accidentally drop my phone when I see the message. She's back? Why didn't she message me? Was she really gonna leave me alone like I asked her to?

kitty_purrfect: Why didn't she message me? Is she okay? Where was she? Please tell her to message me

Liayah: Why would I tell my girlfriend to message another girl?

kitty_purrfect: you're back together?

They're back together? Why do I feel like crying right now? Why does my heart hurt?

Liayah: Yea. Why? Are you surprised? Are you sad? Do you like her now?

I thought about it for a while. Do I like her? Like actually like her romantically?

kitty_purrfect: Yes...

Liayah: Yes to what?

kitty_purrfect: Yes to all of it. I like her. I really miss her.

Liayah: okay. You can talk to her. Her new user is masteryu

kitty_purrfect: what? I thought you're dating?

Liayah: No. I realized her and I are better off as friends. I wanted to make sure you're actually sure about your feelings before talking to her again

kitty_purrfect: thank you Lia.

I can't believe this. I hope Ryujin would actually reply to my message.

kitty_purrfect: Hey. I hope you're well

masteryu: Do you know who you're texting?

kitty_purrfect: Ryujin right?

masteryu: Yea.

kitty_purrfect: where have you been? I messaged your old account. I even tried contacting you in Skype. I had to message Lia.

masteryu: Why?

Why does she seem so cold towards me? I'm not sure if I like it.

kitty_purrfect: because I miss you.

masteryu: You told me to leave you alone. That's what I did. So why are you texting me now?

kitty_purrfect: I told you I miss you. I want us to talk again. I forgive you. Can we start over?

masteryu: I don't see the point of doing that.

kitty_purrfect: Why not?

masteryu: Why would we? So you can hurt me again in the future?

kitty_purrfect: May I remind you that you're the one who lied to me?

masteryu: Yes and I respected your decision when you asked me to leave you alone. You're the one who ended this. When I suggested if we could start over, you flat out rejected me. I even said I will give you space, just don't end whatever we had. But now you want to start over? Are we always gonna go off base on your terms?

kitty_purrfect: I texted you a few weeks later but you already had deleted your account

masteryu: How was I supposed to know you would still talk to me? You made it clear to me that you wanted me to stop talking to you.

kitty_purrfect: You have no right to be mad at me, Ryujin. You're the one who lied to me.

masteryu: Who says I'm mad? I'm hurt. I can still be hurt. But why do you want to start over now? You clearly didn't want it before.

kitty_purrfect: when I was finally calm enough to think. I realized that I was more mad about you lying than you actually being a girl. I still like you Ryujin even as a girl. The whole time you were gone. I was so worried wondering if you're okay or not.

masteryu: You still like me??

kitty_purrfect: Yes. I'm surprised too but I can't get you out of my head. Every time Dana kisses me and touches, I keep wishing it was you

masteryu: Eww. I don't want to think about him doing stuff to you but you're back together with him?

kitty_purrfect: Yes.

masteryu: Then why are you texting me when you have a boyfriend? Especially telling me you like me.

kitty_purrfect: I'll break up with him but I want us to get to know each other again but this time no more lies. We have to build that trust that we lost.

masteryu: I'm sorry for lying to you. I really just didn't want to lose you and I guess in the end I still did.

kitty_purrfect: but I'm here again. Let's forget about that past and focus on now. Now tell me, where we're you?

masteryu: Ahh that. I went to live with my aunt for a while. Her husband's cousin offered me a job there so I took it. I needed a distraction and it seemed like the perfect one.

kitty_purrfect: are we okay now?

masteryu: As long as you're okay with me.

kitty_purrfect: then we're okay. I missed you so much. Can we talk on the phone tonight?

masteryu: If you want. How are you and Eva?

kitty_purrfect: Were good. Eva is turning 2 soon so that's exciting.

We continue catching up about each other. How Dana is still an ass most of the time. How much Eva has grown up. What Ryujin did while she was living with her aunt. She shared stories about her cousins. I couldn't wait until night time so I can hear Ryujin's voice again.