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《Rose》The Godly Fiasco

Reviewer:- therosepoetk

The Godly Fiasco  by Abhinav itz_G14M_official

So to start off, I think you have an interesting sort of title going on here. That isn’t to say that I don’t like it, but it’s a very mediocre name for what kind of story that you seem to be writing. I know this is up to you, but feel free to change your title based on what kind of elements you hope to have. Fantasy? Mythology? Make references, and be creative. Your cover though, is pretty good. I really like how we have the small-looking protagonist facing the larger-looking antagonist, and how the antagonist seems to be in power at the moment.

It’s a common cover theme, but I like how you were able to incorporate that into your visual effects. Good job. Your blurb could use some touch ups though. I like your structure and how you portray the detail, it’s that it seems to be not getting the real message out to the readers. I think you can work on your grammar and perhaps blend with the sentences, and also, not end with “Tune in to find out”. That’s more of a radio or talk show, not a book. Book endings, especially in blurbs, are usually ominous and leave the reader wanting to know or find out more.

If you ever need more help with this, feel free to hit me up. Anyways, your opening is definitely one I have never encountered before, but you make it work. Grammar could use some work around the whole story, so I’m not going to nit-pick at that. But I like how you use the first person to narrate Abhi’s thoughts (or your own thoughts, I’m not exactly sure if you’re meaning to insert yourself as the protagonist in your own story, but that’s cool).

The whole Indian culture thing was done very well, and I really like how you brought in such diverse characters, so that South Asians (such as myself) and even others around the world can come to understand more of who we are and what we stand for in this world. Excellent work. The plot is super refreshing, as I don’t really read these kinds of realistic fiction contemporaries crossed over with fantastical myths, but yours made me want to get into the genre. The flow, the emotional appeal, everything was fantastic.

I think you could rename your chapter titles to add in more humour though, as they all follow the same structure of “I do something”. So I just need you to amp up your creativity level a little bit, and you’re as golden as they come. Keep up the awesome work Abhinav!