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《Kiitan》Twisted by Time

17 0 0

by Rose-Gold_Community

by Rose-Gold_Community

Reviewer: olympian_castles
Written by: @-officialHufflepuff_4
Hufflepuff_4

Cover - 3.5/5
Title - 5.5/7
Blurb -6/7
Hook - 4/6
Plot - 13/15
Setting/Worldbuilding - 14/15
Characters - 19/20
Originality - 3.5/5
Grammar - 5/5
Enjoyment and Engagement - 13/15
Overall - 86.5/100

FIrst Impression - Although there were a lot of people to keep up with, you did a good job of establishing each character and their personality. You were able to establish a setting and plot very smoothly which helped with the boatload of characters.

Final thoughts - I love your writing style, it definitely builds onto the world JK Rowling had already created. Your story telling is unique but it was just a tad bit to keep up with all the characters. I constantly found myself looking at the character index at the beginning to keep up with everyone. The character index was genius but you still may need to lower your character amounts, I suggest you look into character folding. I love your plot and this is a great story.

Improvements
There are a LOT of characters
You may benefit from combining some of the characters together
Having a lot of characters may confuse the reader and they can lose interest.