Tokyo Ghoul - NEST

Sins of a Prophet

" The best way out is always through."
- Robert Frost

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Kurona POV

I sat in my room with an empty mind. I felt like my entire body didn't exist and only my soul was sitting here in an empty room that represents my mind and thoughts.

But I knew that I was in my body because I could feel the numb pain that spread across my body every time they constructed an experiment on me.

I don't know how long it had been, I couldn't tell if it was light or day. All I did was count how many meals I get, and count how many days that adds to. Two meals a day, feeding me this soup.

It didn't work like normal flesh, the soup; instead it only pushed back the hunger I really felt. It was like a serum of madness. Every night I would feel immeasurable pain from being starved, the soup passed right through me without even an nutrients.

Every night I survived it got worse.

Tonight it was the worst.

I held my stomach and clenched the walls, scratching downwards on it and leaving marks. I felt saliva dripping from my mouth as I co inched my teeth together.

I wanted to eat anything. Anything would do nicely. I didn't care who or what it was, but if I saw something I was going to eat it. Devour. Rip and tear.

To consume is to survive. To consume is to live. That is the one principal I've developed over these past months.

Sometimes I remember the faces and names of people I used to know, but all their faces are blurry and their names muffled. It makes me sad, but also happy.

If I forget them maybe it won't hurt as much, right? But not remembering is painful in itself. Knowing of people you thought of friends and family, now I can't even think a thought of them, only blurs.

I hugged myself in a corner, biting my thumb hard. At this point I was considering cannibalism on myself. Is that what they wanted? To see how far I would go to survive this hell?

I wouldn't allow them satisfaction. I refused to go that far, but sometimes I did consider it. All I did that night was wait for my next soup, then at least the pain would go away. But it did taste awful.

I don't know how long later, but a plate slid into the cell, and I rushed forward so fast I hit my head on the door. I quickly grabbed the bowl on the tray and carefully chugged it down without using the spoon.

I was careful because I didn't want to spill any of it. Every drop means even a second of ease. I picked the bowl clean and set it on the tray.

Now I sit with my back against the bed thinking, I wonder what horrible things they'll do to me today? Maybe more pain? Emotional states? Fighting?

They had tested me on multiple things, but I've always slacked in them on purpose to pass them off, and to save strength. But the worst ones were-

"Today you will be with me, Yasuhisa." Said the voice that sent shivers down my spine. I turned my head at the door to find a man with a messed up face, bald with little to no hair on his head.

His name tag read: Goumasa Tokage.

A sadistic man that was in charge of putting me through... pain procedures. He told me once when doing his work on my leg that he once actually knew someone I knew. He told me his name but I only hear a blur.

But whenever I hear that blur of a name, I feel a small pit of sadness and also happiness. It sent me into a state of confusion each time I heard it.