365 {cake/discontinued}

45 {our pretzel ritual}

I love cinnamon sugar pretzels idk where this came from but it was rlly cute at the time idk if it still is
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There's a mall not too far from our house is.

We go there a lot, aimlessly, usually because Michael wants us to go with him.

And every time, we buy a cinnamon sugar pretzel at the Auntie Anne's.

Here's why...

"My Mom Knows What You Did In The Dark," I say, laughing. We're currently attempting to make Fall Out Boy song titles mildly dirty. And maybe failing.

"What A Cock, Donnie," You smirk.

"Ooh, good one. Um...Grenade Humper."

"Lame," You snort.

"If I can get a snort out of you, I say that's pretty good."

"Okay, whatever. Hey, we should get a pretzel."

"Might as well, I mean, since we're right by it."

"Okay. Hi there! Um, can I get one salted pretzel, and a cinnamon sugar pretzel." You pay for it, take the pretzels, and hand me the cinnamon sugar one.

"Sugar, You're Goin Down...on me," You whisper with a smirk, before we sit down at one of the food court tables.

I begin to laugh so hard, tears stream down my face, even if it's not that funny.

"Wh-oh m-haha! Jesus, Cal!"

"I win. I made you laugh harder," You grin, sitting in the metal chair.

"Fine, fine. But I'll take you up on that offer," I surrender, sitting across from you.

"What?"

"I'm ready to go down on you whenever you want," I smirk. "Anytime...anywhere..."

You shudder, and I only get more cocky. "Al-alright, Lukey. Um," You cough.

"Aw, is lil' Cal getting hard?" I ask, hand sliding up your thigh.

"N-no."

I bite my lip, and cock up an eyebrow.

"Maybe," You sigh in defeat.

"Anytime, anywhere, Cal. Whenever you ask."

"You are such a slut, it's amazing."

"Your slut, always."

"This is why we're relationship goals."

"I hate you," I groan.

"Shame. I love you."

"I love your cock, whoops."

"Doesn't everyone?"

I gasp. "I thought I was your only slut??" I say dramatically, mocking a soap opera.

"You are," You grin. "But to me, you are everyone. And by that, you're the only person who matters. To me, at least."

"While I am slightly confused, I am touched and kind of want to cry."

"Don't cry on the pretzels! I paid a lot of money for those!"

"Shut up, Hood."

"Now Luke, you need to swallow all of it," You laugh at the end of your joke, finding it hilarious.

"Oh my god, I hate you."

"But, you don't."

"You got me there." And you roll your eyes.

"Okay, okay. I deserved that one."

And while we made some pretty bad jokes that day, I loved every minute.

Now when I go to the mall, since you're gone, I don't buy a pretzel at all.

I'm saving all my pretzel moments to share them with you, when you come back.

And I'm waiting to go down on you, sugar.
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this may have been sexual and not funny and weird but I liked it and I don't know why (it's bc I'm sexual, not funny, and weird)