My Highlander, My Love

Nessa's broken heart

Chapter 192, the final countdown has begun!

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Hawk returned to Sterlingshire castle like a lost sheep. Scared of what lay ahead of him, he decided to enter the cathedral and throw himself in prayer. Gone was the fun loving, powerful Fay, in its place was a man full of regrets.

He was falling into deep depression, the kind of depression that was lethal to the soul. He didn't deserve Nessa, he told himself, she deserved a man, not a beast! What was he even thinking to agree to such a plan, a plan that destroyed everything inside him.

How was he suppose to live with Nessa, knowing that he had betrayed her? He had betrayed the one person whom he had promised to love till death do them part! William had warned him against telling Nessa the truth, but the truth would set him free. He had to tell her, he could not live this way. He was dead inside, and he wanted to start living again. Telling her would release his pain, and he could be happy again.

Taking a deep breath of inhalation, Hawk walked out of the cathedral, and headed straight into the castle. He would find Nessa and confess what he has done.

He found her sitting with her mother, Kyra, and a few ladies of the court, sipping their tea in the tea room. She did not smile up at him when he walked into the room, she was still upset with him from the night before.

"Come Nessa," Hawk motioned for her to follow him, "we need to talk." He told her, and without waiting to see if she would follow him, he turned around and walked out of the tea room.

Nessa wasn't to fond of him lately. In fact she was looking forward to their talk, so she could tell him off. Marching after him angrily, she followed him up the stairs and into their bedchamber.

"Step inside and close the door Nessa." He told her calmly, and Nessa did as she was told.

"Come sit near me, there is something I want to tell you." He told her gently, and Nessa did as she was told. Sensing something was drastically wrong, she forgot all about being mad at Hawk, and waited patiently for him to reveal what he wanted to tell her.

Sitting in the chair opposite him, Nessa looked into Hawks pain filled eyes and was alarmed at what she saw. What could have happened that had him so upset, she thought, as she braced herself to hear his words.

"I have done something very bad Nessa!" He told her in a broken voice. " I have betrayed you in the worst possible way."

The color drained from Nessa's face, and her heart almost stopped beating, as she waited patiently for his confession.

"I have done something unforgivable and can not live with myself anymore." He said, "I need to tell you to cleanse my soul. I have loved you desperately Nessa, but I was put in a position that no man in love needs to be." He sounded tortured. Dropping to his knees in front of her, he lay his head on her lap and cried.

Nessa's heart beat wildly. What did he do that he regretted this much? Her hands caressed his beautiful, thick, golden hair, and she looked down at him waiting to hear his confession.

Lifting his head up, he looked at her with tear filled eyes, and with trembling lips he said, "I slept with the Valkyrie queen Nessa, I have betrayed your love and beg for your forgiveness!"

Nessa looked at him, and could not believe what she had just heard. Not Hawk! He would never betray her, he loved her, didn't he? "No Hawk, you did not betray me my love, you would never do that to me, you love me." She told him, as her heart started to sink in a pool of darkness.

"I did Nessa! I betrayed you!" He said, "I didn't want to hurt you, but there was no other way, it had to be done in this way."

Nessa pulled her trembling fingers out of his thick mane of hair, and pushed his head off her lap. At that moment the door swung open and William stood at the door, "Hawk stop, don't speak no more!" He ordered breathlessly, but he realized he was too late by the way Hawk looked at him. Glancing at Nessa, he knew that his vision had started to come to life. Fear struck his heart at the realization that if his vision were to come true, it would change everything in Sterlingshire castle.