Roommates 🍋

13.3K 261 381
                                    

I growl at my empty icecream container. He fucking ate it. I had a roommate. Though it never felt like it. He was messy, ate my food, one time he even stole my box of condoms. Though I never saw him. It was like living with a goblin. The most interaction we had was sticky notes.

I scribbled down my frustration before slamming it onto the door.

We worked different times. I worked nights He worked days. When I came home he was usually asleep and vis versa.

He annoyed the crap out of me though. He would leave the house a mess and sometimes bring a girl home while I'm trying to sleep. Every girl was vocal and pissed me off.

This roommate was the one and only Hawks. Thank God the only. I'd throw myself out the window if there was 2 of them. I don't know why he didn't get his own place considering he was such a big time hero.

Today was finally my day off. I walked out to the living room only to see him on the couch in some sweat pants. He had a fistful of cheese puffs and was watching TV with his feet on the coffee table.

"SERIOUSLY! Get your damn feet off my coffee table!" I complain

"Maybe you should get pants on" he raised an eyebrow at my oversized buttonup

"And you should get a shirt on! And you are getting crumbs all over the couch"

"Wanna trade?" He smirked eyeing me.

I pull the shirt down lower and flip him the bird. Force him over on the couch and reach for the remote. He snatched it before me.

"Nope, this is my day off"

"Is my day off too, hand it over" I reach to swipe it but he held it out of reach, "our days off have NEVER lined up"

"I took today off" Hawks shrugged.

I stood trying to reach the remote but he moved it to the side out of my reach.

"Why the hell did you take today off" I complain

"Felt like it, I am having personal problems. So I took a personal day with MY personal TV"

"You ate MY icecream last night so you can hand over the remote as payment"

"This isn't up for debate. It's my TV" he was serious

"Its the middle of the night! You should be in bed"

"I have this whole week off. So no"

I reach to snatch the remote again but he was too quick. He smiled at me cockily

"Whats the password and I'll give you the remote"

"The password is give the damn remote bird brain!" I reach again and he shouldered me away.

I reach and tug his wing to bring him closer.

"Eh! Don't touch the wings!" He squawked his eyes going wide

"Give the damn remote!" I use my sudden advantage to tug at his wing again. I move to the top so I tugged the whole wing instead of just the feathers. He tossed the remote to me quickly and I caught it releasing him while he cocoons himself in his wings.

The week progressed with various fights. Finally it came grocery day. I toss the list to him.

"Get this for the house"

"Sorry, can't" he shrugged tossing it on the table

"Why not?"

"Think of this week off as house arrest"

Hawks X Fem reader OneshotsWhere stories live. Discover now