It's Happening: NCIS

Chapter 56

Melissa's POV:

When I wake up, I'm confused at first. I don't know where I am. I become nervous because the walls aren't familiar which means the arm around me can't be Tim's. Then, I feel relief that I remember that I'm in Ziva's guest room and she's the one holding me. Sadness takes over me when I remember why I'm here and can feel my puffy eyes.

It's a coincidence that seconds after waking up that an alarm starts to go off.

I feel the arm around me move and the alarm stops.

I turn my body to face Ziva's. She doesn't look like she wants to be up this early either. She rubs her eyes to wake herself up.

"Hey." She says in a groggy voice. "How'd you sleep?"

I clear my throat. "Better than I thought I would." I didn't think I would sleep at all. I thought I would have been wide awake with the image of seeing those two together. I never thought I would stop crying either.

"Are you going to work today?" Ziva hesitantly asks as she gets out of the bed.

"Yeah." I mean I did bring clothes for it. There no point in not going if I cared enough to pack for it after everything.

I don't want to go to work today. I don't feel like going and seeing him and her together. Even if they're not together I don't want to see their faces. It's just that I haven't missed a day of work ever. I've had a perfect attendance record ever since I started. I don't want to ruin that because my future might be crumbling before me.

I remember that Jack won't be there today, and I dread the thought even more. I just have to remember that I packed for today.

That's the problem. I only packed for today. I don't have extra clothes for the next day if I don't go back to him today. I don't even know if Ziva will have me another day. I bet she would, but I don't want to put anyone out.

"Are you sure?" She shouts from somewhere outside the room. She isn't here, so I assume that it's okay to change in here.

"No one would blame you if you didn't go."

I would.

I would hear Gibbs voice in my head and hate myself for it. He wouldn't think of it as my future falling apart but us making a problem at work.

I have to go to show that I can do this, even though it's something I never thought I would have to go through.

Another weird thought is that being close to both of them at work will somehow be a distraction. It's going to be better than laying here all day thinking about it.

By the time I'm dressed, Ziva walks in and is surprised to see me ready. Her surprise turns into a smirk.

"What?" I'm not sure I want her to answer that.

"Nothing." She shakes her head. "It's just I've known you for what feels like forever. I lived with you for most of it and I still haven't figured you out."

"Don't say that." She knows me almost as well as Tim does. "You're my best friend."

She comes over to me and hugs me. I don't hug her back right away at first because I don't want to get emotional. When she hugs me and I feel like I'm not, I hug her back like I always do.

She takes a moment to look at me. "Come on. Let's go get some food."

I don't think I can eat. I can act like it though. I don't want to be around people. I will act as if Ziva is the only one there.

She heads out of the room as I grab my overnight bag. I remember last night the bag felt heavier when I packed it. I thought I would have everything I would need, but I guess the tears messed with my eyesight. I guess the heartache made my bones weak.

I don't know what I'm going to do if I see one of them at work today. All I know is I'm hurt, and I feel almost empty.

I look down at the ring on my finger and don't want to take it off. Though, it does feel like I shouldn't have it on either.

No.

I can't think like that.

He's my fiancé and he's that for a reason.

We just have to talk about this and what it means for our future. I don't know if today's the day to do it, but we do have to talk about it at some point.

I mean come on. I slept over my maid of honors house for goodness sake. It means we've made some progress on the wedding.

I hate to think this but deep down I feel as if there isn't going to be one. At least with the date we planned it to be.

Nothing I think or feel can make sense in this moment. It's safe to say I have no idea what today is going to hold.

"Melissa?"

"Coming!" I grab the bag as fast as I can to catch up with her. It's good for me to act as if I do want to go instead of holding her and myself back.

I get to the door where she's waiting for me.

"Are you sure about this?"

"Yes." No.