"HONEY! You will never guess what!" Skulduggery yelled at Valkyrie and he started squealing and jumping up and down like a girl "What?" Valkyrie asked
"Guess!"
"I don't know. Whats wrong?"
"Go on just guess!"
"Ok! You got a dog?"
"Nope!"
"Uh, you got a full body façade?" she asked and Skulduggery stopped jumping and looked at her "How'd you know?" he asked confused "Oh well, it helps with the fact you have the façade activated."
".....oh....I guess that would help wouldn't it?"
"Yeah...."
"Well....now what?"
"Pfffttt! I dunno." Valkyrie said and Skulduggery suddenly smiled and looked at his wife ad Valkyrie caught on quickly "Oh no, detective! Nuh uh! Now way!"
"But please." He purred in her ear and started to kiss down her neck softly but Valkyrie remained unemotional. After a while he was panting for breath and pulled away to look at her and she grinned smugly "Fine then! Ill go make my own food!" he huffed and flicked the imaginary hair out of his face as if he was a girl and walked of. Skulduggery entered opened the cooking book and read the recipe for pizza "Alright, I got this!" he yelled and pumped a fist in the air, he made his way over to the cupboard and grabbed the flour and sugar and placed them down on the table "Ok so we pour the flour into the bowl" he instructed himself and poured the all flour into the bowl, and then he poured in all the sugar. There was already so much in the bowl that it was overflowing but he didn't care, so he went back over the cupboared to get yeast when he tripped and face planted into the overflowing bowl and got flour all over his face "FUCK!" he yelled and walked out the room to go into the bathroom upstairs but because he couldn't see were he was going he tripped on a step and tumbled down "OH SHIT-"
"FucK"
"JESuss CHrist"
"HOW DO I STOP"
"Is that- OW"
"GODDAMIT"
"THAT PIECE OF GLASS ALMOST STABBED mE!" he yelled and finally he reached the bottom and stands up and slips on the wood floor and falls immediately back over. He huffed and got back up realising he still had the flour on his face but he decided to play it safe by washing it of in the kitchen sink, so he walked over to it and turned it on "SHITTTT!" he screamed and he realised that he was washing his face in boiling hot water. He must have turned on the wrong tap. He pulled his face from under the water and ripped the back door of its hinges and sprinted outside where he jumped into the pool, but as he jumped he realised there was no water in it so he face planted the tiled floor and "....oh my god....oh my god that hurt...." he said with a strained voice. He stayed like that for a minute before realising that his face was still burning so he frantically scurried of the floor and tried to climb out but he couldn't get out, for some reason. So he used the air and eventually got up but when he rushed over to the door....it was locked so he collapsed to the floor on his knees and screamed dramatically "IM MELTINGGGGG!".
About an hour later Valkyrie walked in the kitchen to see flour everywhere and the tap overflowing on the floor and Skulduggery curled up outside the door with a bright red face. So Valkyrie walked out the door and looked at Skulduggery confused "Im burning....." he whispered and Valkyrie knelt down next to him "Why are you out here Skul?"
"I was trying to make pizza, when I tripped and face planted the flour, so I went up the stairs but I fell back down, so then I went to the kitchen sink and put my face under the water, but I turned on the wrong tap and I ran out here and jumped in the pool, but there was no water in it so I hit the floor and then I got stuck out here!" he sniffled and nuzzled his burnt face into Valkyries neck and cuddled to her "Ive just had a really bad day." he muttered and Valkyrie started to giggle "Your laughing at me."
"No im not."
"Yes you are."
"Yeah, I am!"
"You hurt my feelings."
"I know im sorry."
"You should be!" he said and Valkyrie brought his face up to hers and kissed him gently and he rested his forehead on hers "How about, we get you inside and you have a nice cool shower to cool you down, while I order some pizza for you?" Valkyrie asked and Skulduggery smiled and kissed her again "I like that idea."
"Alright then! Lets get you inside Skul." she said and helped Skulduggery asked but before they even stepped foot into the house Skulduggery pulled Valkyrie to him and kissed her forcefully. He pulled away after a minute "What was that for?" Valkyrie asked and Skulduggery grinned "For laughing at me!" he exclaimed and walked back into the house smiling to himself.
