The Advice Column II

253

Advice Request
This person likes her brother's friend.

Answered Submission
Hi there!

I understand that liking someone who others might see as "socially incorrect" can be very difficult. But I think the fact that you both like each other is good, because it means that you're not crushing on him and wondering if he likes you back. Knowing that he likes you (and that you like him) means that you can both sit down with your brother and explain how you feel about each other. This would be a good chance for you to tell your brother that his approval for you two to at least give dating a go would mean a lot to you. Explain that, if he agreed to let you date each other, the relationship would not affect the friendship between him and his friend, and that their friendship and your potential relationship would remain completely separate.

Also, try to see this from your brother's point of view. After all, I'm sure that if it were he who liked one of your friends, you would probably feel the same way that he does; you'd probably feel that their relationship would get in the way of your friendship.

Your brother's strong feelings of disliking the idea of a relationship is probably his way of trying to protect you; even though he might not want to show it, he does care about you and wouldn't want to see you get hurt. You have to understand that a younger sibling dating an older sibling's friend can be tough to warp your mind around. It's something that doesn't happen everyday.

But if you really do like your brother's friend, and he has said that he likes you back, then the right thing for you to do would be to tell your brother, and to talk it all through with each other.

Good luck,

The Advice Column Team