The Advice Column II

351

Advice Request
This person is confused about their recent feelings for their guy best friend.

Answered Submission
Hi!

The things that you have told me make me think that you are jealous of the girlfriend, and the feelings that you have for this guy friend are more than just as a friend. However, it could also be that you’ve been the only girl that’s good friends with him, and you’re jealous that his attention is not fully on you like before now that he does has a girlfriend. This reasoning is only applicable if he doesn’t have any good female friends aside from you. If he has had other female friends before, I’m pretty sure that you like this guy friend more than just as a friend, and you’re threatened—or in other words, jealous—of the fact that he already has someone else.

To be clear about your true feelings for him, ask yourself these questions:
1. If he does have feelings for you, how would you feel?
2. If he asks you out, would you say yes?

I think you’ll figure out your feelings by yourself from the answers that you have.

In order to help you curb your jealousy, I think pouring out your feelings through writing would help a lot. It helps me. I don’t like telling people much about what I think, and when I feel like there are too many things going on with my life and am too overwhelmed by everything, I turn on my laptop or take out a piece of paper and write down the things that have been bothering me. It helps relax me, and since you like writing, I think this will have the same effect on you too.

I hope this helps!

Wishing you the best,

The Advice Column Team