The Advice Column II

372

Advice Request

This person wants advice about losing a best friend.

Answered Submission

Hi there!

Losing a best friend is never easy; it does not matter whether you lost a relationship because you both had a fallout, or because he/she moved away, or even because he/she passed away.

It's normal to feel sad and depressed. Even if your ex-best friend is not the nicest person in the world, it's okay to feel sad. You just lost someone that you've spent a lot of time with making happy memories. There are bound to be moments where you wish they were still there. So what I want to say is that, first, it's okay to feel depressed.

1. Let yourself have that time to feel sad over what happened. Don't bottle all of your feelings inside of yourself. It is never good to do that as it will only backfire in the end.

2. If you have other people you can talk to, tell them about your feelings. Tell them about how you feel with the situation. Vent to them about everything so you can finally let go.

3. Write down your feelings. If you find it hard to talk to other people, write down what your thoughts and feelings are on a piece of paper. And if you want to, you can write what you wish you could say to your old best friend. It does not matter if the letter never reaches them or even if you decide never to give it to them. It still might help give you a sense of closure.

4. Take what you can learn from this situation. Try to look at your current situation from different perspectives. Is there anything you can improve on as a friend in the future with other people? Is there anything that you should avoid when making friends?

5. Focus on yourself. Take this time to improve yourself and build yourself. Find a new hobby, join a club, or do anything that you want so that you can focus more on yourself. In time, you'll get over losing your best friend as you are now focused on doing something else.

You don't have to find a replacement for your best friend straight away. Finding a best friend is not an easy process, so don't fret or worry too much if you can't find a new one in just under one week. You'll find one in time, and I hope that she/he will be the best best friend you'll ever have.

I hope this helps, and I wish you the best of luck.

Love,

The Advice Column Team