Claiming My King | DARKNESS SERIES #4 ✔️

Chapter 16 Liam's POV

Three days later

"Fuck off Quetsia" I tell her down the phone sitting on the lobby floor crying like a fucking bitch, while I have Ruby between my legs in her car seat, crying her heart out at me and I can't help her. She wants mummy and she's not here. Fuck!

"Liam?" I hear Angelica's voice and she crouches down to me rubbing my back soothingly.
"I know why you left. We're here for you Liam. Whenever you need us, don't push us away please" she tells me sounding emotional and I just stare at my baby girl.
"I just need to be alone with a bottle of JD and let myself do what I do every year Angelica. Can you let me do that. And I'll see you tomorrow for dinner like I said. I promise" I tell her and she nods her head.
"If that's what you really need then yes. But I don't want to leave you like this Liam. Where you going to go?" she asks me sounding concerned and I sigh.
"Back up to my room then fuck knows. Because I'll be drunk" I tell her.
"Shall I take you to your room? Do you need Jason?" she asks me looking at me
"I need my mum but that ain't gonna happen is it" I spit a little angrily. But soon regret it when she removes her hand from me and backs away with Ruby like she's scared of me. Fuck! No no no...
"I'm sorry, it's just... Hard you know" I tell her staring hard at the floor.
"I understand, I'll leave you. I'll see you tomorrow, ring us if you need anything. And I mean anything Liam. We love you" she says and I nod my head still staring at the floor as I see her leave out the corner of my eye with my princess. Fuck what am I gonna do? I swig from the bottle and stand up. Walking toward the entrance I down the rest of the contents and bin the bottle looking for a shop to buy a bottle of rum. That's what I need.
I find myself a shop and grab two bottles of rum.
"You sure you should be drinking anymore?" the cashier asks me and I throw the money at her taking the bottles.
"Just do your job and don't worry yourself about what I need" I tell her and walk out.
I make my way back to my car which is parked outside the hotel and jump inside. I start the engine and pull out and head towards my queen hoping to see her at least.
Driving by the bakery I see her lights turned on in the living room and I park up and just stare at the window hoping she can feel me out here wanting her. I drink some of the bottle and spark a spliff and time just passes by hour after hour of me sitting there watching her window but nothing. Her light goes out and another turns on and she comes to the window opening it and looks out. I watch her lean her head on the window. I thought she was happy? Where's Victor.. His cars not around either.. Is she upset? I swig from the bottle just wanting to go to her. I step out the car and continue staring at her. Taking swig after swig trying to convince myself she's OK... She's OK. She has to be!
And suddenly I hear her laugh and I sigh pleased but sad. Sighing heavily I climb back into my car as she shuts the window and closes the blind. She's happy Liam. Move on. I down the bottle and open the other one.
"Why's everyone leaving me? My mum, my queen.. Who's next?" I ask myself and down the rum feeling numb now. What's the point in anything? Does my princess actually need me when she has Angelica and Jason. They did adopt her after all. I'll never be good enough for her. I'll only disappoint her aswell. I feel myself getting emotional and I start to drink more not wanting to cry. I did all of this. I caused my own fucking heart ache. I'm just a massive fuck up and I'll never change. I swig some more and start my car not knowing where to go, but being parked here knowing she's happy is pissing me off.
"Please help me mum, I need you right now" I ask out loud hoping for a sign or something but I get fuck all. Sweet fuck all! Speeding off I skid round a corner and rev my engine fucking about because I have nothing to lose.
I swerve on to the other side of the road into oncoming traffic swigging from the bottle and accept what's about to happen. I can't do this by myself any longer.
The car infront swerves me and I sigh thinking what was the point.
"Sorry mum maybe next year I'll see you" I say to her then laugh swigging from the bottle. Suddenly getting the urge to go to the grave I put my floor down. I need to see you mum.

Arriving at the cemetery it's all locked up like normal so I push the bottle through the hole and climb over the fence and drop to the floor. Fuck! That hurt. Shit.
Standing unsteadily I try to balance myself and take myself to my mums grave knowing exactly where to walk.
I drop to my knees as soon as I find her and cry instantly. Mum.. I crawl across her grave and hug her headstone as if it was her.
"I miss you mum, I'm sorry for everything and I love you so much. Why did you have to give up on me mum. I needed you and you just gave up" I cry and put my head down.. "I couldn't get my queen back, I'm sorry I let you down. She's moved on mum, I've lost both of you now and I don't know what to do mum I need your help" I ask her grabbing my bottle and drinking some more.
I feel myself slowly sliding down her grave as I cry uncontrollably wiping my eyes but the tears won't stop. I need you mum. Please come back to me. Is the last thing I remember before passing out.