Bungo stray dogs One Shots

Ranpoe - Battle

The only correct way to stop a couple fight is with a battle. Really who would be so boring and communicate about it? The only real way to settle it is with a fight. But not one where someone gets hurt (at least not physically). Fistfights are optional but other battles are way more recommendable. Like tickle fights. Or playing chess. There has to be a loser and a winner. Something to finally settle this dispute with!

Ranpo munched on the chips that he had in his hand. He wasn't going to lose this battle, no matter what. He was lazy and all but once he wanted something he wouldn't give up. Also, a reason why he and Poe became a couple.

Poe was standing next to him. Nervous but determined. He wasn't going to let Ranpo win this one! He wouldn't lose this time! He was so sure about it!

"Uhm... yeah this way...", the policeman led them to the crime scene. It was more than awkward enough to have outsiders settle this case because the police couldn't. And now those two detectives seemed to be rivals which made the whole thing more awkward. Plus this policeman had just been in this town for a few days so he didn't know about the common knowledge in this town...

Which common knowledge you may ask? For example that if you see a brat named Ranpo being lost you point him in the opposite direction just as part of revenge for him calling everyone stupid. Or if you see a blonde girl that is being kidnapped you have to arrest those thugs at all cost and put them into a high-security cell. Because then they have at least a 1% chance not to get killed by a certain someone who was against child trafficking. Or that you should never even try to flirt or look at a beautiful woman in a Kimino... There was so much more to count but let's stop for now.

So this poor soul didn't know what was about to come. He didn't know about Ranpo's intellect. He didn't know about Poe being a millionaire who looked like a nervous edgy adult that was just too pure. He didn't know that this was a common way for this couple to settle their fights.

And while they walked towards the dead body the other policemen murmured. It seemed as if they were skeptical or laughed about their colleagues not being able to solve this case. Though this was an illusion. They just betted on who would win this time.

The body on the ground belonged to a young woman. She was probably in her late 40s. All her records were clean. She had no illegal involvement. It just seemed as if she had gotten up with the wrong foot this time. She left behind her family without even saying anything, the gun still placed in her hands. Though the superior still doubted that it had been suicide. Doubted that and wanted to make sure by letting a detective check it.

"You don't want to check the body or are you too gReAt for that?", Poe snarled at Ranpo. The tall man scuffed a little as he crouched down to take a better look at the victim. He also put on plastic gloves lie he learned to do he wasn't a prick like Ranpo.

"Well I can figure it out faster than you without even getting my hands dirty", Ranpo said in a monotone voice. He could solve this case within a few seconds. Like he could do with all cases. After all the other goldfishes just didn't see the obvious hints.

The reason he didn't was that Poe was at the crime scene now. How should he focus if he could just watch Poe concentrate so hard and try to win?! Plus he was crouching down if you know what he meant...

Carefully Poe checked for all the evidence. If there was gunpowder on her sleeve. The angle at which the bullet entered her head. Other possible signs like her life, how she had fallen, and so on.

It took the two just a minute. Only one minute. One minute to completely forget about what they were fighting about. Only one minute to completely get wrapped up in the mystery and already screaming inside about how interesting this case was. Which was obviously not respectful to the victim and a very odd personality trait but as long as they didn't kill anyone themselves...