Bungo stray dogs One Shots

Fukumori - Avoiding III

One. Two. Three.

It was simple. Only one, two, and then three. One sentence between (mostly) two beings with three words. One. Two. Three.

It wasn't really hard to say. Mori did say it sometimes just because it had become a habit of some to exaggerate at times. For example when Koyo broke all the limbs of someone who underestimated her in battle. That was such an iconic moment.

Still for Mori voicing his own emotions was pretty difficult. Emotions were something he would never voice before unless it was for such trivial things. He contained them. They were a weakness. Something dangerous. He had them bottled up for long now it felt the most natural to do so. As f he was a machine.

"It has quite the simple meaning you know? I can say it all the time without feeling embarrassed!", Dazai threw into their conversation. They were once again discussing the feeling of love.

"I don't feel embarrassed, Dazai", Mori sighed. It was a matter that was hard to explain to everyone else. Even for Dazai.

"Then why not say it? I mean you say it so much to infiltrate, to flatter people. Yet you won't say I love you to your new hubby? I'm starting to pity the old man! ", Dazai scolded his old mentor and boss.

"I do have everything I need at the moment, don't I? I have work, money, and subordinates I can trust. I do not need this feeling called love", Mori shrugged. Any other explanation at the moment seemed worthless at the moment.

"Nah Mori, you still love him, don't you? You DID avoid him all the time after all and everything that you listed is just to survive you know? I also thought like this for a long time until I met Oda who taught me what love was! Even just platonic love! Until I learned what friendship was and later with Chuuya how to love", Dazai leaned forward. Though he seemed to not see what Mori meant.

Mori sighed. How could you explain your feelings to another person? How could you explain that you bottled everything up for so long that you felt empty? It was a paradox but this just described how Mori felt. That everything he said and did was nothing but worthless. Was nothing but cruel and hurt others.

Life was Mori's nightmare. Only through feeling nothing could he survive now. Feeling something? Not after all the regret and all the decisions dragged him into hell. Not after he was nothing but a grim reaper. Someone who was only meant to destroy.

"Happiness is a feeling that was never meant for me Dazai", Mori sighed and turned towards the pile of documents.

Dazai stopped for a second. He never expected someone like Mori to say something like that. He didn't even seem to have a little bit of doubt inside him. He was talking about it as if he was talking about the weather.

"But the boss is not going to accept that as an answer, you know? It's just three simple words so say them!", Dazai now understood why Mori felt so annoyed when he and Chuuya got into an argument before.

"You don't understand how the world works. Where there's good, there's evil. It's a simple rule. The rule is to keep everything balanced. Happiness and sadness. Trust and betrayal. As long as you stay in the middle there won't be a downfall", Mori sighed and took another document to take care of.

"Well, then that also means that when there's love there's hate! It doesn't have to exclude one another. In every good, there's a little bit of evil. In every happiness, you can find a little bit of sadness. You can betray someone because they trust you to do the right thing", Dazai now balanced a book on his head. He was surprised at first but hey he also didn't want to show that he miscalculated that.

A small silence filled the room as Dazai slowly stood up and stretched: "It's pretty late now. If you'll excuse me I'm going to annoy Chuuya now... You shouldn't let Fukuzawa wait too long, seems like he's even more stubborn than I thought".

"I never invited you here in the first place".

"Yeah was nice meeting you too! Bye~", Dazai waved as he exited the room.

Mori took a look at the clock as well. It was VERY late. There was probably the next shift in the office right now. Not to mention that Mori hadn't slept for a long time. So there was no other way but to go home now. Especially since there was no escape after all...

As Mori exited the building a tall figure that was leaning on the wall got up. Mori sighed silently...

"Took you long enough", the tall white-haired male remarked.

"You were not asked to wait anyway", Mori shook his head and looked towards the sky. Dawn was already arriving and painted some beautiful colors into the sky.

Fukuzawa just silently followed as Mori walked towards one of his apartments. He purposely chose one that was far away. "How long do you plan on doing this now?".

"Until I'm certain".

"Certain of what? I haven't even told you anything you know that? Aren't you a fool right now?", Mori once again shook his head in disbelief. He never talked about love in any way. So why would Fukuzawa think that way?

"I guess. Then can you say it so I know for certain?", Fukuzawa calmly asked. Their eyes met.

"No", Mori only blinked a few times. Bold move.

Fukuzawa nodded as if he expected this answer: "Then you should find a different option. Love can become bitter after time".

Once again they walked there, on the sidewalk, in silence. Did Mori want to voice it? He didn't know. His head was screaming no after all. And his heart? His heart had stopped working long ago. Thankfully. A heart was the biggest burden a human had to carry.

Saying it would mean defeat. Would mean that he had feelings. Could start a storm inside him. Did he want to risk that? Mori looked up into the sky. He didn't feel alive after all. But not saying it was a burden he had to carry.

"Three words, huh?", he quietly said. Three words that changed words for so many. That could destroy and create. Three words that held so much power. Feelings that would be a way to pure than to be voiced by someone like Mori.

One.

Two.

Three.

Fukuzawa turned around with a small confused look on his face. He looked at Mori who had just tapped his back three times.

"I will do nothing more than that", Mori cleared his throat trying to regain composure despite his face being slightly red.

The white-haired male had to wait for a minute to catch himself again. That was unexpectedly cute.

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That was not the planned Chapter for Avoiding III but it just kinda fitted so I rewrote it a little...? Hey I really liked it, I dunno if you do as well but heeeeeeey uwu

So yeah ByulComet also wanted a third chapter so I hope I met their expectations... 

Btw this Chapter is a bit inspired by the song "Wake up" from NF if anyone is interested :D