Bungo stray dogs One Shots

Soukoku - Winning and losing

A quiet work atmosphere was something that rarely happened in the mafia. Everyone was just cleaning up and finishing their tasks. Especially one office was unusually quiet.

Mori, Koyo, and Chuuya had been sitting in the office for quite some time. They were handling the leftover paperwork to finish the day in silence. No music, no videos, no speaking.

It wasn't an uncommon situation after all. Koyo had slowly dragged Chuuya to those work hours to teach him how to do paperwork. And because fighting and screaming wasn't everything a mafioso had to do. If she wanted him to succeed then she had to teach him that.

So now there was the mafia boss, an executive, and a sixteen-year-old boy in one room working in silence. Mori didn't mind the company but he could also live without it. Nothing beats working alone for a week and finishing every piece of paperwork. Koyo only said that it was sad and unsocial but who was she to judge?

It was a sweet silence. Something you can't accomplish just in a moment but one that builds itself. A rare focus and get-together. A gem that was just meant to be shattered.

The door flung open.

And in the hallway stood the one and only: Dazai. He had a wide grin on his face and had his hands still stretched out from pushing the door open. His coat was closed and a new bandage over his right eye

Mori's sigh was not to be heard. It was clear that the productive and silent working hours were over now.

Both Chuuya and Dazai were sixteen. They were almost adults and had learned to grow up faster than everyone else. The world had forced them to do that – like it did to so many others. They knew how to do taxes (or more like how to skillfully 'evade' them) and they had killed many more than others in the mafia.

So judging from all this Koyo and Mori were both absolutely baffled hearing the next thing:

"I peed in the sink!"

Not even a smile graced Chuuya's face (much to Dazais contempt). Chuuya only narrowed his eyes at the brunette. That was a strong start. But he had learned throughout the years. After having Dazai around you for a while, you just start to adapt more and more. Because losing is not an option.

"No need to exclaim that, you idiot!", Chuuya said and crossed his arms. "After all, where else would you do the deed? The TOILET?". Chuuya scoffed.

Dazai narrowed his eyes as well. A good comeback but he would soon reign victorious.

Mori and Koyo looked at each other. What was going on? Mori never thought that having to educate two sixteen year olds on toilet etiquette would have been necessary. Especially not when those two were the double black duo feared by many.

"And how has YOUR day been, oh tall one?", Dazai said with a sly smile.

"Well," Chuuya turned around with a smirk, "It had been very BAD". He gave Dazai a thumbs down which Dazai noticed-

Oh no. That was a critical hit. Dazai never thought there was even a CHANCE he could lose to the chibi on their self-proclaimed opposite day but this was a critical hit! Wearing socks as gloves?! It felt bitter just thinking about it, but that was a genius idea.

After all, it hadn't been long before Dazai and Chuuya had set a day to only do the opposite. It was always the third Thursday of the month. Because Dazai was bored and needed more stupid stuff in his life. Dazai had easily won until now. But there was a new threat arising.

The goal was to only do the opposite until one of them messed up. The winner would be called 'Your Majesty' by the loser for the rest of the day. So it was important to make the other lose as soon as possible to really get a good payout.

"You sly giant...", Dazai said. But he wouldn't be Dazai if he wasn't prepared for this. Dazai looked down, seemed like he had to use his big comeback now.

Dazai clapped in his hands: "Alrighty! Let's get to work!", he exclaimed in a suddenly cheery voice. It was the complete opposite of his mood before. With a swift motion, he opened his coat and stood there in all his glory. Boxers over his pants.

"What am I looking at", Mori mumbled and turned back towards his paperwork. Dazai had always been unpredictable but now it had gotten worse with Chuuya. Just two boys being children and having stupid fun together like they never could before.

Keeping his distance the brunette then walked towards his desk. He turned the paper work around so that it was upside down. He then took a pen and started writing in a perfect-upside-down-way.

Chuuya scoffed. Dazai was such a strong opponent! Where did he get the idea to prepare so much stupid stuff?! Switching his gloves and his socks had been Chuuya's best idea so far! Yet that maniac had turned his upper hand into dust!

"UGHHHH I LOVE YOU, YOU SHITTY IDOT!", Chuuya screamed out while he jumped up. He wouldn't give up! He could prepare something! He wouldn't lose this time! He needed to take a break and prepare! This was a necessary evil!

Of course, it was! After all, it was the opposite day so it would have meant the opposite right?! NO NEED TO GET EMBARESSED ABOUT IT! Chuuya stormed out of the room thinking if he could turn around this hopeless game.

"Love you too~!"

"SHUT UP!"

"' Shut up'? Did you mean to keep talking or...?".

"URGHHHH I HATE YOU, YOU MACKEREL!", Chuuya screamed and stormed out. Another loss! Shit!

Dazai followed the small ginger with a shit-eating grin. No way was he going to let the chibi escape after Chuuya lost! It was time to be even more annoying than usual!

__

Mori and Koyo looked at each other. Were they confused or were they just frustrated and used to this weird stuff the two of them always did?

"What have I just witnessed?", Koyo asked and looked at the still open door.

"I don't know. This doesn't even sound like a story you could think of in your right mind...", Mori replied. His eyes were fixed on the open door as well.

"Dazai lost, right?", Koyo asked.

"Yes. Chuuya had really punched him out of it with this one...".

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That was random. And stupid. And not good. But hey maybe SOMEONE enjoyed it xD It was at least funny to write..

Thank you for reading this (and maybe the other) Chapter(s as well)! I really really appreciate all the support and love reading all the comments and everything! All that despite me only updating like once when the moon is in the right position! Sadly I don't have much time anymore and am constantly overworked. So I cannot update much.... Still, I love writing and I will try to continue as much as I can! (I got so many ideas as well!!!)

For everyone who has wished for a chapter and I haven't written it yet: Sorry I was too busy but it's on my to-do list! It's just that the next time I can do something for myself will probably be around February... uff...