My dad can fuk off.
He now is banning my mom, and by extension me, from going to the store without him.
Let me say that again.
He's banning my grown asss adult mom from going to the store unless he's with her.
Why?
Because she was "making Smooch faces to a guy at self check-out."
No the fuk she wasn't, I was there!
But it doesn't matter, because he doesn't trust me either. I'm not fuking joking.
One of the bigger fights when he was drunk yet again, I went to check on the youngest who was awake. And while I'm in there making sure they're okay, my dad acts like I'm whispering things into their ear, and he gives me this glare of just...distrust. Of almost hate.
Then he had the audacity to ask where my mom would go, and then pull some gaslighting sh!t like "No, no! I'm sorry, I don't think that!"
The fuk you don't.
Was already bad enough I can't go anywhere on my own because I don't know how to drive, but my mom was chill.
But now I can't go anywhere unless my over controlling dad allows it?
A lot of times, if he goes with my mom to the store, I have to sit at home and do unpaid babysitting. So by extension, this schist affects me too.
And if I do go too, he fuking dress-codes me.
I'm an adult nearing drinking age. He'll be upset if my clothes are a little to his unliking. It's not like I'm going out looking like a hoe, I'm wearing jeans and a baggy T-shirt ffs.
He once forced me to wear my boots under my pants because "It doesn't look normal on someone your height to wear them over pants."
MOTHERFUKER, YOU PICKED THESE EXACT BOOTS OUT FOR ME
WHEN YOU DEMANDED WE GO SHOE SHOPPING BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T LIKE THE ONES I HAD ON AT THE TIME
And he only ever compliments me if I'm wearing cutsy feminine stuff. When I wear makeup (which is rare), if I put on the only skirt I have, kept insisting (and still does) that I should have my hair long.
He literally made her cut off all her guy friends, but chats with plenty of women on FB and calls them beautiful.
If he doesn't have a side-chick, I would be genuinely surprised.
He never accuses her of cheating with women though.
Either because he thinks her being married to him suddenly makes her straight, or he'd be fine with "watching."
This dude seriously has too much sex on the mind.
Now, my mom shouldn't be telling me this stuff either because I'm her new adult daughter and not her middle age friend. But sometimes when he drinks, it's because he's mad she wouldn't send him nudes in the middle of the day. Which he asks for every day.
He's yelled about their sex life in front of his kids, I remember comforting my sibling and hearing "I fuk you, but you never fuk me!"
I got stuck feeling every shake, hearing every sound, in the RV we were stuck living in.
He literally once waved around a dirty magazine that the gas station cashier "gave away to him" in front of me when talking to my mom, and obviously kept it because a calander from that magazine was later hanging up in his work shed.
This guy has some weird obsession with sex. Yet he wonders how I knew about it at a young age.
When I was a young teen (You know, going through new fuking hormones), I kept going back to this FioLee smut fic. And instead of having a talk with me, or telling my mom to talk with me, the ahole grounded me from the internet for an unspecified amount of time until he fuking forgot and my mom let me sneak on.
No "Be careful, some things are dangerous."
Not a "Sometimes this stuff can be damaging."
No. It was grounding me because I was a new teen dealing with new teen feelings.
And on top of being a new teen, there was the amount of sexual sht in my life because of the crap he pulled.
But I bet when my brother hits that age and goes through new puberty things, my dad'll have a nice sit-down with him.
He's an over-controlling paranoid narcissist, with a pinch of sexism. (And transphobia but that's a whole other thing)
I don't even feel like I can write my original books because of him.
On top of me not wanting my ideas and MCs compared to Ichigo, the books I genuinely want to work on involve LGBTQ+ characters, especially main characters.
(I genuinely hate Bleach now because of him.)
Even if I did get to writing it, I want to self-publish and I don't trust him with helping market it or anything.
I just want my parents to divorce and I choose to live with my mom.
I don't want a drunk breathing over my gods dam shoulder every fuking minute other than when he's at work.
I just want to get away from this. It's BS and I deserve better.
