Okay, why the fuk isn't there a dark cover of Rude? There's rock covers, but nothing that sounds dark.
You have dark covers of Animal by Neon Trees, Bad Romance, Toxic, plenty of Disney Songs like Surface Pressure and Kiss The Girl, Can't Help Falling In Love With You, You Are My Sunshine, and so on. Some even start sounding like the POV of a stalker.
So why not Rude?
Let me set the stage:
Original song is about a guy who wants to marry his girlfriend, but her dad is refusing to give them his blessing. And though they'd rather do it normally, they plan to elope if the father keeps refusing to bless their wedding.
Now, let's dim the lights.
A guy wants to marry the girl he obsesses over, and she denies him. So he thinks if he begs her father, he can get her to marry him easier.
But the dad knows his daughter doesn't want to be with the stalker and denies him.
With this in mind, let's read the lyrics with a darker tone:
Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life?
Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know
You say I'll never get your blessin' 'tll the day I die
"Tough luck, my friend, but the answer is no"
Why you gotta be so rude?
Don't you know I'm human too?
Why you gotta be so rude?
I'm gonna marry her anyway
(Marry that girl) marry her anyway
(Marry that girl) yeah, no matter what you say
(Marry that girl) and we'll be a family
Why you gotta be so rude?
First off, the guy is begging for the father's blessing, then justifying his actions with "I'm human, too!" and "Well, you're being rude."
And with this darker tone, the lines "I'm gonna marry her anyway, no matter what you say, and we'll be a family," get much creepier. He's saying that "I was hoping for your help in this, but I guess I'll have to go the harder route."
I hate to do this, you leave no choice
Can't live without her
Love me or hate me, we will be both
Standin' at that alter
Or we will run away
To another galaxy, you know
You know she's in love with me
She will go anywhere I go
With a darker tone, this would imply that he kidnapped her, that he's taking her somewhere she'll never be found. He'll go absolutely mad without her, and he'll take her wherever he goes.
He "hates to do" this because he'd rather at least one of the other parties be consenting it, whether she does or her father makes her. But instead, he results in kidnapping.
This whole part would just ooze with a creep factor.
There is room for a dark stalker cover of this song, dam it!
