Stray Kids Ship OneShots

40-Jeongchan : Anxiety

Title: Anxiety

Ship: Jeongchan

(Note: this was made after I had an anxiety attack. I was trying to calm myself)

Jeongin's P.O.V.

Anxiety. It was something I dealt with almost twenty four-seven. The welling up in your chest, the blank thoughts in your mind. The tears that come effortlessly whether you want them to come or not. The pain that would swell up in your chest. That was the physical aftermath of my anxiety.

It hurt.

Especially when I met him.

Chan hyung. He was so kind. My anxiety did do anything then. It was when he sounded angry at me for the first time.

I didn't want him to be angry at me. I wasn't even sure of what I did.

"What did I do?"

"Don't ask me that stupid question, Jeongin. You know what you did."

I nodded and the room. I didn't want to be in the same room as him.

We had moved in with a bunch of our friends, and me Chan Hyung ended up being roommates.

I went to the coatracks, taking my coat and sliding it on.

"Jeongin? Where are you going?" Minho Hyung asked.

"To a cafe, nearby. Don't worry, Hyung!" I said, waving. The welling up of guilt and fear was giving into my chest as I closed the door behind me.

I walked away, my mind starting to go blank.

No. Not now. I haven't reached the park yet. I thought as my legs began to slow down.

And I stopped, in the middle of the sidewalk, not too far away from the house. I didn't want to stop. Not yet at least.

But tears came rushing out of my eyes as guilt fear was the only thing I felt. I tried to think of things for it to go away but nothing seemed to work.

I clenched my teeth as I felt worst and worst over something I didn't even know. Every sound around me being blocked out as I closed my eyes, trying to block my tears from escaping.

I felt my body shake as I came in contact with someone. But I couldn't process who it was when they forced my head up and I was looking at them in the eyes.

Who's in front of me? What are they saying? I can see their lips moving but they aren't making any sound.

Until.

"Jeongin! Listen to me!" I let out a gasp as I finally registered who in front of me. Minho Hyung.

"I-I..." I looked around to see everyone had come outside. Had my anxiety really blocked out that many people?

At least, everyone but Chan Hyung was here.

My chest hurt. And I knew it was from the harsh anxiety attack that just occurred.

"Are you sure you were going to that cafe?" Minho Hyung asked me. "Or were you trying to get away from us so we couldn't see your attack?"

I sighed, clenching my chest as I looked down.

"Chan Hyung is mad at me." I whispered.

Minho Hyung sighed, pulling me into a hug. "It's okay, Jeongin. He'll forgive you." Minho Hyung reassured.

But I didn't feel assured. I wanted Chan Hyung being the one to tell me that it was okay. I want to know at least what I had done.

"I bet you he was upset about that thing Jeongin went on with Sanha." Felix Hyung stated.

Minho Hyung sighed, again. "Yeah. Woojin Hyung, can you go talk to him about it?"

I heard running back to the house and I could only assume Woojin Hyung had headed back to the house.

"We should get back. It's cold." Changbin Hyung said from behind me.

We went back to the house and they set me on the couch. My chest still hurt and I could only wonder when the stinging would stop.

I closed my eyes as I rested my head on Minho hyung's shoulder. Hyunjin Hyung was running his fingers through my hair as he sat next to me.

I heard running footsteps towards me and I slowly opened my eyes to see Chan Hyung crouch in front of me.

"Jeongin?"

I lifted my head and looked at him.

"I'm sorry, buddy." He apologized. "I didn't mean to get so angry."

He stood and helped me to stand. He pulled me into a hug and told me it was okay.

Just how I wanted.

Thank you, Hyung.

A/n
Yup, sorry about that. One of my friends blocked me and kind of acted like she was mad. And I don't rlly understand what I did. Like she's done it before but I had an attack because she blocked me on both of her accounts.

I'm sorry if you read that. None of you need to know what's going on with me. But thank you for reading this.

(Btw, this isn't completely accurate. But I usually block out all sound when I'm in an anxiety attack. And my mind goes blank. Then I feel fear and guilt. And then about a few minutes after my chest hurts.)