Surrender Rollins

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I laid in my bed, my body covered in sweat as a nightmare tore through me. I kept tossing and turning, but I couldn't get away from the nightmare.

He was back.

I kept telling myself to wake up. I knew it was a dream, but it wasn't working like in the past. I was completely consumed by the nightmare, that nothing was work.

He couldn't be back.

"Well Amanda, it is amazing to see you again." He voice spoke, and I tried to move away from him. I started to curl up in a ball, as I moved further into the corner, but he got closer.

"Go away." I whispered, and he kicked me hard in the side, and I yelped.

"Don't give me orders, Manda." He smiled, before kicking me again.

"STOP IT!" I cried. He just continued till I gave up.

"Okay!" I cried. He smiled as he knelt in front of me.

"Good, Amanda. Now, come to the bed." he breathed. He pulled me up by my hair, and slammed me against the wall before moving to the bed, and I steadied myself before walking towards the bed.

Tears ran down my cheeks as I limped towards him.

"Now, when was the last time we made love?" He questioned, and I felt ill.

"It hasn't be love making. You've been raping me." I replied, and he slapped me hard. My head swiveled to the side and I gasped.

"The correct answer was a week again. You've been too ill." He stated, and I felt like throwing up on him right now.

"Please, I promise to be good." I breathed.

"No. We need to rekindle our love." He exclaimed. He grabbed me by my hair, and pulled my head back. He kissed his way down my body, as I swallowed back my vomit.

Don't get sick, Amanda. He'll beat you till you can't walk.

He raped me, and when he was done, pain radiated through my body.

He kissed me, and it was sloppy, before walking out. I ran from the bed and towards the bathroom. I vomited and then stood slowly.

He did this to me.

I looked in the mirror and saw my once medium length blonde hair was cut short, and was uneven. My face was swollen and black and blue. I looked at my bare body, and noticed how different I looked. 

The cuts. The bruises. The burns. The scars. The ugliness.

I was too caught up in looking at the damage he had did, and I didn't notice him come back in.

"I like my handy work." He smiled, before grabbed my ass. I squeaked, before he slammed me against the wall.

"Don't fight, and I won't kill you."

///

I completely lost track of time. I didn't know how long I had been there, but I knew that there was enough time to leave his mark on me for the rest of my life.

"Stupid whore!" He screamed, before hitting me hard, over and over again. He got angry when I tried to escape.

"Don't!" I sobbed, and he hit me again, this time right in the stomach and I couldn't stop myself from getting sick.

"You are going to regret that." He laughed.

He ripped my soiled shirt from my body, and threw it to the side. He was quick to start raping me, but before I knew it, someone pulled him from my body, and I screamed from the pain. I looked around and saw the room filled with police. One quickly found a blanket and laid it over me, while another broke the handcuffs.

"You're safe now." One breathed, as I started to sob.

"Liv." I whimpered, before everything went black.

///

I woke up, and I swallowed hard as I looked around the room. I started to cry, and my heart started to pound. The alarms on the monitors went off, and people rushed in.

"Amanda, calm down. Deep breathes." The doctor spoke, before forcing an oxygen mask onto my face. I tried to push it off, and he pushed it onto my face with more force.

"You NEED to breath!" He exclaimed, and I nodded with wide eyes.

I used the oxygen mask, and soon my body calmed. I pulled the mask away and looked at the doctor.

"Where am I?" I questioned, and he frowned.

"You're in the hospital. Do you know what happened?" He asked, and I nodded.

"My CO. Is she here?" I asked, and he looked at a nurse, and then he nodded.

"Olivia Benson?" He asked, and I nodded quickly.

"Yes." I breathed.

"I'll go get her." He replied.

After a few moments, Olivia came into the room. Her brown eyes held so much warmth, but a frown was set into her features.

"Amanda, how are you?" She breathed, and I swallowed hard.

"How'd you find me?" I asked, and she sat next to me.

"You left those hints." She smiled, and I nodded slowly.

"What's wrong with me?" I breathed, and she looked at me with confusion.

"Medically?" She asked, and I nodded.

I already knew what was wrong with me. I was still breathing.

"Broken bones, internal bleeding. Busted ear drum. Um, and your pregnant." She spoke, and I bit my lip.

"How long was I there?" I questioned.

"A month." She breathed.

"How far along?" I breathed.

"A little under a month." She spoke, and then she reached out and wiped a tear from my cheek, but that one tear was quickly replaced by others.

I was a mess and I wanted to die. I was being forced into having his spawn. I knew I couldn't abort the baby. It was against everything I was taught.

"Don't worry. Everything will be okay." She promised. Then a phone rang.

I shot up straight in bed, my body shaking from the nightmare. I quickly ran my hands through my hair, and then felt the stirring in my stomach. I swallowed hard and ran my hand over my stomach.

Then I heard the phone rang again. I reached for it on the bed side table.

"Rollins." I breathed as I answered the call.

"Amanda, we got a case and Liv wants your help." Fin spoke, and I nodded slowly.

"I'll be there soon." I replied.

"Alright, Mandy. I'll see you soon." He spoke, before hanging up.

I sat my phone down, and swallowed hard.

"Jesse, can you calm down for Momma? I know I must've freaked you out, but for God's sake, you're feisty." 

Hey guys! Thanks for reading! Please vote and comment all of your feedback! I'd also LOVE if you could help me by commenting different one shots! Check out the Author's Note for the two options I'll accept. Lots of love! <3

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