Law And Order: SVU One Shots

Meghan Kate Benson [Part 2]

Part two, finally. This is for you, again, peetalo!

I sat in a chair in the tattoo pallor, as the tattoo artist ran the needle over my arm, as he wrote "Unwanted" in black ink. I felt so sad and unwanted, that I was going to keep this tattoo as a reminder of my parents, especially my father.

It was hard to wrap my head around the fact my father was one of my mother's bosses. That I've been around my father for so long, but didn't even realize. I had expected it to be my mother's best friend, Elliot, but instead it was a man I've considered a self righteous bastard.

My mother might've claimed that my father loves me, even if he isn't involved in my life, and probably wouldn't for the rest of my life, but he didn't. If you love someone, why would you let them think that you didn't love them, for so many years?

///

After I got my tattoo, I walked towards 1 Police Plaza. I don't know why I wanted to, but I also knew I wanted to see him. I wanted to see if he would react to me. Or if he wouldn't even recognize me. I haven't seen him face to face in awhile, so why would he? It's not like he fucked my mother and I came from it, or anything like that.

"Sweetie, can I help you?" A woman at the front desk asked, and I blinked and nodded slowly.

"Where is Captain Tucker's office?" I questioned, and she looked at me confused.

"Why do you want to see Captain Tucker?"

"I just need to talk to him real quick. It'll only be for five minutes."

"I'm sorry. He's in a meeting. I'll tell him you came to talk to him. Can I have a name?" She asked, as she turned to look for a notepad, and instead of just telling her, I quickly walked over to an elevator, and hit a random button. I'll do this the hard way.

///

It took me half an hour to find his office, because even after asking, it was hard to navigate these halls. I walked towards his office, and went to knock on the door, but instead it opened, and I was face to face with Elliot.

"Meghan? What are you doing here, bud?" He questioned, and my mother overheard him, and she looked over his shoulder and at me.

"Meghan." She breathed.

"I need to talk to Captain Tucker. So please let me through."

"Meghan, he's busy." My mother spoke, but I just pushed past both of them, and walked towards the desk that my father was sitting at. I stared at him, and he looked up and at me. I saw his expression change, and he swallowed hard.

"You're Olivia's daughter, right?" He questioned.

"I'm your daughter too. Does that even matter?"

"Daughter?" Elliot and my father said in unison.

"I've been fucked up my whole life because of you. I know that you and my mother couldn't be together, because you are her boss. But it would've been nice if you could be my father. That you could've been there for me. Yeah, I have men in my life. Cragen, Elliot, Fin, John. I have people in my life to try and help fill the void that you left in my life, but it isn't the same. I yell at my mother more than not, and I make her feel like she's did a shit job of raising me, but in reality, she stepped up because you couldn't. I bet you even asked her to abort me." I hissed, and then I rolled up my sleeve, and pulled the bandage off.

"I'm unwanted, Ed. Do you see that. You made me do this."

///

I was pulled out of the room by my mother, and she dragged me out into the parking lot, and tried to force me into the back of the sedan, so she could drive me home, but instead, I sat on the concrete thing that helped hold up the tree and dirt decoration, and I sobbed.

I was broken, because I knew he still didn't want me. Or at least that is what I wanted to feel. I didn't want myself, because he didn't want me. 

I sat and cried, and my mother took only a few moments before she sat next to me, and pulled me into her side. She rubbed my back gently, as she placed soft kisses to my hair.

"You are wanted, Meghan. I want you so much." She whispered, and I shook my head.

"How will any man ever want me, if my own father didn't want me?" I whispered, and she could tell that just that simple sentence showed how broken I was.

"They will want you because you are amazing. You are smart, beautiful, kind, and amazing in general. You are going to meet a man, and make him so lucky because he can be with you, and love you how you deserve to be loved."

"I'm going to break up with Luke." I whispered, and she looked at me.

"What?" She mused.

"He doesn't love me. He just wants to sleep with me. I deserve better."

"You do." My mother grinned, before wiping a few tears from my cheeks.

"Wanna go talk to your father?" She questioned, and I looked over my shoulder, and saw that Elliot and Tucker were standing together.

"Can we just go home?" I asked, and she nodded slowly.

"We can do whatever you want, baby. I'll even punch him if you want me too." She smiled, and I laughed, and she laughed.

"I love you, Mom. I'm sorry for being so dramatic lately. For hurting you."

"Never apologize for your feelings."

"I'm not apologizing for my feelings. I'm apologizing for hurting you. I know I apologized earlier, but I don't think I can ever stop apologizing."

She stood up and then pulled me to my feet. She pulled me into her arms, and held me close for a moment, before looking over at Elliot.

"I'm taking her home. I'll be back soon."

///

Olivia's POV

After dropping my daughter off at home, I drove back to pick up Elliot. He and Tucker were still outside, but this time sitting on the curb, and I was surprised they were talking.

I parked the car, before getting out and walking towards them. I looked at Tucker as he stood, before slapping him.

He looked at me with wide eyes, and I took a slow breath before speaking.

"You are going to get involved in our daughter's life. You will never make her feel like a mistake ever again, and you are going to actually act like a man. Not some dick who fucks everyone over. No, you are going to step up and be a father. I will force you if I have to. So beware. Because my daughter will never cry over you again."

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