💫She's Different💫

Bella's Struggle

Mom's House (Ms.Hinds Perspective)
"I want to meet my granddaughter."
"I know you do,but we can't rush things so quickly. She's a kid, remember?"
"I missed ten years of being involved with her."
"And you will get to see her, just not right now Mom. We have to give her some time to take things in. Especially with the fact that she's leaving the school I'm working at. She has things going on in her life. We should wait until the summer at least." My Mom sighed and continued to cook.
"Alright." She started speaking under her breath and I had to walk away. I wasn't going to let Bella be hurt any further. Olivia told me that Bella went through something traumatic. She'll possibly never tell me if I forced her into meeting the family. I didn't want to hurt the poor girl again.
*******
April 3rd (Bella's Perspective)
I watched as my Mom put on some makeup.
"Have fun on your date mother."
"Why thank you."
"Mom, are you sure you're not too old to be going on a date?"
"Not at all. I rarely get to have any considering I have such a stressful job and two pre-teens."
"Who's that at the doorbell?"
"Check the security."
"Umm...Mom..."
"What?!" She said worriedly.
"Some thing's not right." My mom looked at the camera and then covered my eyes.
"Bella, go into the library for a moment." I didn't know what was going on, but I knew it wasn't okay. I saw my Mom go downstairs and say some things to the people that were downstairs.
"Bella, it's fine."
"Okay Mom."
"What happened?"
"Don't worry about it Noah."
"Mommy, you look angry. Calm down." Her face was a bit red and I went to go give her a hug.
"Bella, it's okay. Lucy's coming in a few." When Mom rushes her sentences you know she's mad and Noah and I can't ask her because she'll get even more mad. So we kind of just stare at her instead of saying anything. And she just kept rubbing my back because that helps her calm down.
"Hey guys."
Hi Lucy."
"What's going on."
"Nothing. Kids, how about you guys go downstairs and watch a movie."
"Okay." I went downstairs with Noah and I knew what she was doing.
"What happened?" He asked.
"I dunno, I just know that she yelled at some people that were in front of the door smooching or something."
"It had to be more than smooching."
"What was it?"
"I'm not gonna tell you."
"Why? Tell me!"
"You'll learn about it one day."
"I hate you for that."
"Kids, I'm leaving."
"Bye Mom." We said.
"See you in the morning."
"Yeah." When she left I looked at Noah and then pressed pause. We were watching some random movie but it felt really babyish so I didn't want to watch it anymore.
"Are you texting a girl or a boy?" I asked.
"Stay out of my business."
"You're always in mine. It's well deserved. You're a hypocrite."
"Look at you using big words."
"You're the definition of agitation. I'm going to my room where I won't be annoyed by a boy who falls in love every five seconds." I went back upstairs and opened my diary.
Dear Diary,
Something weird just happened and no one is telling me anything. Totally not fair! No matter how much older I get, I always have to wait! I'm not a kid anymore, I want to be treated like a teenager! They're basically allowed to do whatever they want, right?
*************
West 67th Street (Olivia's Perspective)
"Mom?"
"Yeah?"
"Why did you pick me up from school today? I was gonna walk home."
"Just wanted to spend sometime with you. Do you not want to spend time with me? You seem really on edge babe. Stressful day?"
"Everything has been annoying me lately. I don't know why." My 10 year old said as we crossed the street.
"Has something been on your mind?" Bella didn't answer and started messing with her backpack straps.
"Bella Danielle, what's been on your mind?"
"Nothing." She said swiftly. We walked into Starbucks and she quietly sat at a table as I ordered us both drinks. I came back with a coffee for me and a vanilla bean frappe for Bella.
"Thank you." I sat down next to her and she stared out the window quietly.
"Bella, is there something we need to talk about?" She took a sip from her drink and didn't respond.
"Bella?"
"There's nothing to talk about."
"Oh really?"
"I don't have to tell you about it. I want some privacy. I'm not a little kid anymore. I'm not just gonna sit here and let it all out. I'm not 5,6,7, or 8 years old anymore." I was shocked as my daughter spoke. She doesn't want to talk to me anymore?!
"Bella, maybe some thoughts are better kept in your head. You're getting very disrespectful."
"No I'm not."
"Bella, you are not going to backchat me young lady. Or I'm taking you straight home. The next time you talk back to me like that or you decide to be disrespectful, I will ground you and you won't get to go to Axel's party." She said okay and then tears started dripping from her face.
"Why the tears young lady? You're upset that I talked to you?"
"No. I'm not telling you." She wiped her tears and stared blankly at the table. Part of me wanted to just pick my baby bear up and make everything better for her, but she's growing up. She needs and wants space right now.
"Do you want to go home love?"
"No, I want to spend time with you. But I'm not feeling good lately."
"And I know that you don't want to talk about it. I won't invade your privacy if that's what you want."
"I just..I think I need to go home." And with that said I drove us home and watched as my daughter sat in the backseat, with her head on her purple backpack and sniffing every few seconds.
***********
My Bedroom (Bella's Perspective)
I don't feel confident right now. Sometimes I look in the mirror and I see more things wrong with myself. My hair is curly, and rough. I could barely comb through it half of the time, so I go to school with a hood on my head. I mean, Mom and Lucy still do my hair for me sometimes. But I have to start doing my hair myself, and I just don't want to deal with it anymore. I looked at myself in the mirror and put my hand over my mouth to stop myself from crying loudly.
"I look terrible." And I did. My eyes were really swollen. Another reason why I was like this in the first place was because of Maria. I thought she was a real friend. But she isn't.

"You know Bella's black right? Probably why her hair looks so nappy."
"Bella's only half white, so she isn't as cool as us."

And then I wonder, why am I crying? What she says isn't even true. I know that. So why do I care?! But at the same time, it's hard not to care, people hear these things you know? Maybe it's good that I'm leaving. Aunty Toni said that she'd handle it, and not to worry. I couldn't cry in front of her, she doesn't allow weakness. So I acted badly towards Mom. I feel terrible for that. She never deserved all those times I was rude to her. I needed to apologize.
"Bella?" My Mom sat down on my bed and put her arms around me.
"You need to do something about this hair love. It's getting a bit rough." I cried, again.
"Bella? What's wrong?" I know Mom didn't mean to hurt me. But I was still pretty worked up.
"Maria won't stop talking about my hair."
"What is she saying about your hair?"
"About how it's nappy. But it isn't, I've just run out of styles. I've been having some bad hair days. It won't work."
"Bella, I know you wouldn't cry over just that. I need the whole picture."
"They been harassing me because I'm half black, I don't have a dad. I'm ugly and crap. I don't care about the words much, I'm leaving Westbury. But they're leaving notes in my desks, harassing me after school, and shoving me in the hallway."
"Maria and who?"
"Marianne, Anya, Amira, Gloria, and that's it. My friends would never. They don't care about where I came from, not like they know. But still."
"You need to stand up to them. You shouldn't let these people make you this upset, when you get like this you're helping them win. And you told Toni, am I correct?"
"I have. She's handling it she said."
"Okay, so you don't need to cry hun."
"But words hurt."
"I know sweetheart." I put my head in her lap and she stroked my hair.
"Wanna go put in some braids?"
"Now?"
"If you want."
"Yes please."
"Go shower and change. It'll all get better. You're leaving soon bear." She was right after all.
"Ryan!"
"Woof!" I gave him a kiss and it helped me feel happier. My dog always makes me feel better. That's why he was practically my favorite family member out of the four of us. Mom left the room and I cuddled with my dog for a couple of minutes. Breathe in, breathe out.