My Diary

Entry 137

May 19, 2022
7:40 A.M.
Thursday

Boy, I am frustrated. So I was writing this entry earlier, but then my tablet didn't wanna work with me and it didn't save what I already wrote...so I have to rewrite fucking everything...ugh, how I fucking hate technology... I'm seriously so upset right now. I just don't got time for this shit. Anyway, so today is May 19th and if you're still reading this, you should know at this point May 19th is my birthday. So I'm now 21 years old. I can legally purchase alcohol and cigarettes now if I wanted to. I'm not going to because I don't drink or smoke, but the fact I can do it is mind blowing. Anyway, I work tonight though because my boss hates me and I mean that. Everyone else can get their birthdays off but nope. Not Zoe. Only reason I got my birthday off last year was because my birthday landed on a day that I don't work. That's it. Anyway, since I work tonight, I did my birthday celebration yesterday since I was off yesterday. So first of all, my mom and I went out to eat for my birthday which was nice. There was no arguing and bickering whatsoever like we used to do. We mostly talked about how much we hate our job because our job fucking sucks but I will get to that in a moment. She did ask about how me and my boyfriend were doing and I just told her we're doing fine. And she was on my ass asking if I was going to move in with him because I'm not sure if I've mentioned this but he has brought up moving in together a couple times before and I'll be honest, I'm still on the fence with this. Its not that I don't love him, but it's a big step to take in a relationship you know? Not that I'm worried our relationship is just going to fall apart if I move in with him but I'm not sure if I'm ready yet. This is my first serious relationship and I'm afraid of rushing this, especially since I know he got out a really toxic relationship before shortly getting with me. All I gotta say that I'm certain with is that I want my driver's license first if I do decide to move in with him so I can get myself around because he's not always in town because of his job so he can't drive me around. I'll like to be able to get groceries myself you know? Haha. But yeah, my mom was saying I should do it just to get away from my grandparents but I'm not sure yet...I'm still thinking about it. But since I am 21 now, my mom apparently was joking with our boss that she was going to get me drunk and he was just like "Just not a night she works, okay?" Haha. I ain't gonna get drunk though. I would like to avoid alcohol as much as I can. Anyway, after going out with my mom, my grandparents threw me a small little party at the house and only one of my aunts and my cousins came. That's it. Nobody else. Nobody loves me...haha. But it was nice. My granny got me a nice steering wheel cover and a little cellphone holder since I'm not sure if I've mentioned this, but I did get a car not too long ago. I'm sure I have. Anyway, the steering wheel cover is all sparkly and all, I like it. Though I do like fluffy steering wheel cover I already have. But my granny did get me a new one so I should use it you know? Besides, it's not a bad thing to change things up. But yeah, yesterday wasn't too bad a day so that's nice.

Alright, I gotta vent a little about my job before I end this entry because I'm just frustrated. So we lost a server on the night shift because they moved away. So guess who's stuck having to pick up on shifts? That's right, me. Because like I've said before, my boss hates me. So I'm being scheduled overtime for the past couple weeks and let me just say, I'm tired. Working these 9pm-7am shifts back to back constantly gets really exhausting after awhile. Not only that, I despise working nights so being scheduled extra nights sucks ass. However, we are losing a couple servers on 2nd shift and I'm just like "How the hell are we going to cover 2nd shift?" But I did come up with a proposal. I wouldn't mind two or three 2nd shifts during the week and then Friday and Saturday nights 9pm-7am since we are short a server now on the shift. Plus, those are the busy nights so I want my money. I'm not going to completely abandon nights if we're short a server, you know? But nope. My boss refuses to do that. He refuses to move me from nights whatsoever. Hell, according to my mom, she told him I'm just sick and tired of working nights and that he should move me to 2nd shift since we are losing servers on that shift and he straight out told her he's not moving me. He's even told me he straight out isn't going to move me. So when I got coworkers who are all like "Why don't you move to 2nd shift?" It's like, I can't! He's made it very clear he won't move me! Which is annoying because I know if it was anyone else, he would do it. But like I said, my boss hates me. Oh, I need to tell you about this before I forget. So like two weeks ago, it was just me and one cook scheduled. However, I learned there was choir and a baseball game going on at the highschool and every time there's an event going on at the highschool, we get slammed since we're literally right next to the highschool. So of course, I message my boss about this in hopes we could get some extra help. But guess what he told me? He basically just told me to handle it myself. So I had to serve $1,100 in sales by myself. If you couldn't guess, that burnt me the fuck out. Not only that, I learn the next night that one of my coworkers was going to come in to help but our district told him he don't got to come in because our boss said he was going to come in to help. No the fuck he didn't. He just fed me to the damn wolves. He's lucky I didn't walk out because other servers would of. Not to mention, I got no sleep before work that night so when 7am came around, I was fucking exhausted. And according to my mom and a lot of the 1st shift servers, my boss has had a really bad attitude lately, which I've noticed myself from the few interactions I've had with him. Like I remember one time I accidentally spilled sugar everywhere because the lid of the pitcher that the sugar was in fell off. He saw me spill the sugar and immediately snapped at me for it. For one, I didn't think it was that big of a deal. It was just some sugar. Besides, I always clean up my mess. He knows this. But he came snapping at me and I just said "Dude, I don't need your fucking attitude". He looked shocked I said that and I was just like "With how you treat me, it's a damn miracle I haven't walked out. I don't care you're my boss. If you can't treat me with respect, I can walk out this door" and he just shut up. But apparently his attitude has been so bad lately that was one of the servers on 1st shift is quitting which is upsetting because this server is actually hardworking. I hate to lose someone like that because our boss is an ass. But yeah, he wonders why I hate this job so much...it's like if I had a boss who didn't constantly treat me like shit despite all the extra work I do, I wouldn't hate this job so much. I mean I even told him I'm getting burnt out from his job and then he schedules me constant overtime and I swear, it's just to spite me. This job is just so aggravating...like I've said, my boyfriend said I should take a break but I can't because of my grandparents...and I'm not sure what I wanna do with my life yet so I don't know about looking for another job yet. Damn, what do I do? Anyway, I think I've ranted on long enough so I'll shut up. But yeah, that's an update on the life of Zoe. I'll talk to y'all next time. Bye!