My Diary

Entry 13

February 1, 2019
12:16 A.M.
Friday

Shouldn't I be sleeping? Yes. Is it going to happen? Probably not anytime soon. My mom and Sonny are fucking at it again. I'm not 100% sure what it's about, but I'm sure it's just the same old bullshit. Like I'm so stressed right now that I'm experiencing body tremors right now. Oh, I forgot to mention this. Like 2 weeks ago, I ended up having a panic attack on Wednesday, the same week when I went to my grandparents because it got so bad. Yeah. A panic attack that randomly hit me in 5th period so I had to check out. The next day, I stayed at home in fear of another panic attack. But just so you know, I haven't had a panic attack since. But I know my last one was related to Sonny acting like a violent tyrant. So since this is happening again and I'm experiencing body tremors (which I haven't before), I'm fearing that I'll end up having a panic attack tomorrow at school. Well, today technically since it's midnight but you get the point. But I know if I fear it, the chance of it happening increases. So I just got to calm down and breathe. But Sonny has gotten so bad that he's even scaring my poor baby, Lady (my dog). Also, on like Sunday (at least I think it was Sunday), Sonny's dumbass got jacked up on meth because his friends were doing it. Like really bruh? You sound like a freshman in highschool. So am I surprised this fight happened? No. Am I tired of it? Definitely. But unless my mom breaks up with his dumbass, I'm stuck with this...