Chapter 70

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The night is going to be longer than I expected it to be. 

"Sage'' Sophia called my name a little loudly, making me break my eye contact with him. I looked away and cleared my throat. I didn't respond to him, instead, I grabbed the glass and filled it with water.  I gave him a side glance before walking out of the kitchen with a wildly beating heart. I could feel his eyes boring holes in my back. My grip on the glass tightened and I took deep breaths to calm myself. I don't know how I'm going to tell him. It's not that I'm afraid or anything. I just don't know how he will react when he comes to know I'm searching for a job. What if he disapproves of me working? Sage, stop everything. It is not important now. You need to focus on Sophia and Logan. I talked to myself. 

"Have some water it will help you calm down a bit?" I said when I reached the couch. 

"Thanks" She took the glass with still that anxious look on her face and gulped it in one go. 

"Drink it slowly," I said immediately, not wanting her to choke on it. Head chef who had followed me out and was now looking at us with his steady grey eyes. She ended up coughing in the end because of gulping it fast. 

"Feeling better" I patted her back soothingly. She nodded while wiping her lips with the back of her hand. 

"Why do you think Logan is going to propose to you?" my husband sat beside me asking her more like interrogating her in his stiff voice. 

"Even if he does won't you accept it," he said, further in his same stiff tone scaring her even more. 

"Stop scaring me don't you see I'm already scared," Sophia said looking at him with blank yet glaring eyes. My eyes soften looking at the scared and blank-looking eyes. She didn't know what she would do if he proposed to her. 

"Did Logan tell you he is going to?" I asked her softly with caution. I want to know if Logan has mistakenly said it to her. We all know how outspoken he is. The only secret he successfully kept in his stomach was me being a woman. Sophia looked at me still biting on her lower lip in nervousness. 

"He has been behaving differently lately. This morning I saw him with a catalogue of my favourite diamond rings and when I asked him he hid it" Sophia said while exhaling loudly. He has given her enough hinds to doubt him. I looked at the head chef for a few seconds then looked back at her. 

"What if he proposed to me? What will I do?" she said while lifting her hands in the air in distress. I have seen her running away from him before too because she thinks he is too good for her. I knew then too she had feelings for him but commenting on it and accepting it was scaring her and today too she was back in the same dilemma. 

"You love him?" I asked in the same soft voice wanting to know what was in her heart. 

"Of course I do. He is the only one for me," she said without any hesitation. 

"Then what's the problem," the head chef said as soon as Sophia confessed her feelings. 

"The problem is I'm not ready to take such a big decision in my life," she said in distress while moving her hands in her hair in little annoyance. 

"What if we break up? What if one day we wake up and don't have feelings for each other? That day scares me" She said with difficulty and I could understand her words. I felt them because I was leaving in that situation. What if the head chef finds someone more compatible, more charming and intelligent? What if he one day realised that marrying me for revenge is the stupidest decision and he wants to rectify it? That day scares me too but I can't live my today in fear of it happening tomorrow. In the end, even though our insecurity is born from our self-doubt they are always not supposed to be true. It is just that I have created a difficult hypothetical situation in my head and pushed myself into it to learn how I will live my life once things go downwards. In the endeavour to live better tomorrow, I'm wrecking my today from overthinking. I'm worried about the day that might never come in my life. I took a deep breath and swallowed my emotions. I can't let my emotions take over me now. I need to be there for my best friend when she needs help. 

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