𝑳𝒆𝒐𝒏 𝑲𝒆𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒅𝒚| ɪᴍᴀɢɪɴᴇꜱ ʙᴏᴏᴋ 2

January Rain

AN: I've never really written a songfic before, but I figured there's a first time for everything.

If you like it, let me know so I can write some more imagines in this style.

This one's inspired by January Rain by PVRIS.

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Always forgive but I can't forget
I'm stuck in a moment,

"I just can't believe you!" I yell, throwing my hands up as Leon sighs and shakes his head at me, as usual dismissing my feelings.

"It wasn't like I had a choice." He replies, finally meeting my eyes.

I let out a fake laugh, knowing I'm fighting a losing battle. "It's always work with you...when do I become a priority?" I rhetorically ask, letting my shoulders slump in defeat. Leon doesn't reply, he never does.

I'm beginning to wonder if our relationship is more trouble than it's worth with the constant arguments and uncertainty. I can forgive Leon for leaving me for so long at a time, but I'll never forget how much of us he misses each time.

The stains on my bed
You made permanent
You made an omen
Fell from the high
Cried through the nights
But you didn't know it

It all went so wrong so fast. One minute Leon and I were kissing, skin to skin and smiling, so in love. The next his phone rang, beckoning him to a mission across the country. He didn't even ask if I would be okay on my own for two whole months, so quickly my tears of pleasure turned to tears of sadness. Not that Leon would know, I kept my crying bottled up until he left.

The psychic was right
A beautiful lie
Lost in emotion

I spoke to my best friend only a week later, telling her about my relationship issues and the way Leon keeps choosing others over me. I tried to hide the pain, but she saw through me. Insisting that I shouldn't be this unhappy, that I should take back my joy and meet someone new. The idea was immediately terrifying, I didn't want to listen to her. Despite the issues, I loved Leon.

I was so in love and lost in him that I lost myself too.

Always knew you would leave me dry
I wasn't ready to say goodbye

It was Leon who pulled the trigger on us. One night he was packing, but when I somberly asked what mission it was this time, he shook his head.

"This isn't for a mission."
I stared at him.
And stared.
"I'm doing this for you." Was his excuse.

Refusing to acknowledge this was happening, until Leon had handed me back the keys to our apartment, and left me with nothing but a forhead kiss and a broken heart. 

January Rain
It never really goes away
Still remember how you taste
Somewhere in the bitter and sweet dream

It wasn't always bad.
We had so many good times too.
One time, late at night, Leon found me alone in the kitchen eating cereal, he chuckled, took it from my hands, and slow danced with me to no music.
He kissed my lips. My eyes. My soul.

Do you think of me
Standing in the summer haze?
When we were gonna be okay?
Did I wash out in the January Rain?

The last time I remember being happy with him was his birthday.
He didn't want anything special, so I planned a picnic in the field.
The sun was shining, it was ridiculously warm and there were so many wildflowers around us. Leon lied in my lap, I fed him sweets as he grinned up at me, his skin bronze from a previous mission.
I thought the rainy days were over for us. That we'd finally made it.

I wonder if he thinks of me too?

My eyes are red
The roses are dead
You know I still hold them

A knock at the door startles me out of my thoughts. I rub my teary eyes, rushing to get up and almost knocking over the vase of dead red roses. Leon got me them, and I haven't been able to throw them out yet, somehow they help me feel closer to him. Like he's still here, ready to buy me another bunch like he used to.

You chasing me down
On my side of town
And now it feels stolen

I finally answer the door, not expecting anyone to still be there after the delay, but lo and behold, Leon stands there soaked from head to toe, the January rain outside has done a number on him, and all I want to do is smooth his hair down.
His eyes meet mine.
Sad. Hopeful. Yearning.
None of us talk, we just clash in a passionate embrace, making up for the last few days without words to ruin our moment. I pull him into the apartment, feeling him as he shivers.

"I'm so fucking sorry, I never should have left you. I let my job consume me, it was the only way I knew how to payback for surviving everything I have, but it made me forget about the reason I live. I swear I'll make it work this time, I'll be better and be here for you, I'll never leave again if that's what you want." He pleads.

Always knew you would leave me dry
I wasn't ready to say goodbye

I nod, forgiving him and glad to finally have an insight into his mind. Relief fills me as he pulls me to his chest, arms drawing me closer than ever as I close my eyes. "I never wanted you to leave, I love you so much."

"I love you too." He murmurs, kissing the top of my head as thunder booms in the distance. I'm glad we're safe from the rain.