Sanders Sides Boiz Oneshots

Blackout [Desleep] (Husbands AU)

This one was requested by an awesome boi named _Cherry-Cola_ who honestly is a great person to follow him. He's great. I love him.

Warning:: I went crazy with the profanity. Sorry. So profainoty haters beware.

STORYTIME!

Deceit walked through the door. Today was just a rough day. Working as an agent for the government isn't really working out in his favor today. Someone murdered a marine and then a naval captain and they still haven't found the killer. His boss was up his ass woth a seven yard stick and no that is not an exaggeration. Deceit unlocked the door to his house, which he shared with his living husband who should be asleep at this hour, and was ready to crash either in bed or on the couch. He didn't give a flying fuck about where.

"Welcome home, Darling. Let me get that for you."

Deceit blinked hard when Remy, his doting house husband, took his suitcase and jacket that was too heavy for him to wear during the humid nights. Deceit walked inside blankly, closing and locking the door behind him. Remy hummed some tune while hanging the coat on the rack and bringing the suitcase into his office. Deceit walked a few steps and saw the grandfather clock passed on in his family as an heirloom. It was well past midnight. Why was Remy still awake? Deceit better fuss at him.

"Remy, go to bed. It's far too late and you need your 'beauty rest'. Your words not mine."

Remy walked out of the office, raising an eyebrow at his husband. Since when was he the one in charge in this relationship? Remy snickered and ignored the statement. He can risk a singular night of not going to bed at an ideal time. He can relive those college days where he wouldn't sleep a wink for over a week and still function like a normal human being. It wasn't healthy, but it was fun as hell. Deceit followed him into the kitchen as Remy took out some of his sparkling apple cider. Remy doesn't do alcohol. He's better than that. Very high maintenance too. But everybody loves their sassy gay son.

"Remy, I'm warning you. We both should get to sleep before it's too late. I will carry you if I must."

That's a lie. Remy and Deceit both knew that very well. Remy had gotten bigger with muscle mass after starting to do running and Deceit can't even lift him anymore. That and Remy will claw at him to put um down because he has gained a new fear of being dropped after trying ice skating once with his older sister. Not fun being dropped on ice. He still has a bruise from it. Remy rolled his eyes and poured himself a glass of the bubbly drink. You know what? Maybe he can get Deceit to fall asleep soon. He looks like he is going to collapse. He's swaying left to right like he's dizzy and his eyelids were drooping. Remy, being the caniving little shit he is, thought of a plan.

"Look, just go sit on the couch or go to bed and I'll meet you there. I'm thinking we could watch a movie or something. I just want a quick sip before I go. Is it too much to ask that I see you when you get home?"

Deceit sighed, falling for the guilt trip. Wanting to make sure Remy actually does get to sleep, he chose the couch. It's a comfy couch with a recliner on it. One of the perks of getting a high paying government job: they can afford the good stuff. Deceit reclined and placed a pillow under his head, not wanting to get too comfortable but also not wanting to Be miserable when waiting for Remy. However thisnplan didn't work and he was out cold. Remy waited five minutes to make sure. When Deceit as snoring, he knew his little trick had worked. Robbie Rotten would definitely be proud.

Now it is time for Remy to act in his nature and pamper his tired husband. Remy set down his drink and grabbed a special blanket that his own mother had knitted for him and draped it over his body. Remy then grabbed tons of extra pillows and placed them freaking everywhere. Under his head, under his feet, in his arms, everywhere. Deceit hugged a pillow, thinking it was Remy, and smiled in his sleep. Remy did hear the mumbled "I love you" that left his lips. Remy felt a warm feeling in his heart, only to be described as pure love, and he mumbled an "I love you too" right back at him.

Remy sealed his plan up with a gentle kiss on the forehead to before returning to the kitchen. He took a large shot of apple cider before putting it back in the fridge and placing his cup in the dishwasher so he could put in a load when he wakes up sometime around ten or eleven in the morning. He turned out the kitchen light after making sure all the doors were locked and navigated himself to the bedroom. He ain't sleep on no couch! Deceit best be crazy if he thinks Remy would risk his hair like that! But hey, Crazy = Genuis. 

Goodnight, Deceit. Remy does love you with all of his heart.

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Yeah there's more to the story.

Five thirty did eventually hit and the alarm in his pocket rang, forcing Deceit to groggily awake to start getting ready. Where was he? Oh lord he has the worst crick in his neck. Deceit slowly began to feel all the pillows around him and the itchy blanket. Is he on the couch?! Christ, how long did he stay at work last night for him to basically blackout like a drunk man?! Deceit sat up and let his eyes adjust to the darkness as though he was some sort of nocturnal animal. The memory of last night ran through his mind. Deceit slapped his forehead at how stupid he was.

"Goddamnit Remy. I love you..."

This wonderful love-hate relationship is what kept Deceit going. He managed to throw all the things off of him and get the recliner down. He blinded himself with the kitchen light, noticing how Remy forgot to put the bottlecap back on the apple cider. With a scoff, Deceit opened the fridge and screwed it back on. He noticed there was a sticky note on the bottle. He took the sticky note and read over it, recognizing the handwriting as none other than Remy's. Well no shit, dumbass. Who else's would it be? Fucking Jehovah's? Wake up, man.

Good Morning, My Love. I know you're going to hate me so much after what I did but hey, I'm baking cookie later so Forgivsies? Good. I know you can't stay mad at me for long. Anyway when you get off work on Sunday I have loads of FUN PLANS for us so as long as you get through today, it's going to be great~. Love you baby! -Remy

Deceit chuckled at the note. Of course Remy has plans for Sunday. It's the only day of the week where Deceit isn't working forever and a day for the freaking government. Deceit folded up the stick you note and shoved it in his pocket. His clothes aren't too wrinkly or smelly. Just a few puffs of cologne and it's basically a shower and new suit. Deceit grabbed a bagel and shoved it in the toasters. Whelp. Welcome to a new day, Deceit. It's good to have ya.

1255 Words

Yeah I did kinda go crazy and casual with this. I really hope you like this Alex! I told you I'd get it out today!

There's always something to look forward to, no matter how big or small. Even if it's just coming home to see your pet, getting through the week so you can do whatever you want on the weekend, or getting through this class so you can get to your next one that has your friends in it. There's always gonna be something to look forward to, you just gotta find it.

Internet hugs and blow kisses!

~Eva