Snippet of when Seulki first joined BTS and how her insecurities took a toll
A/N: Mentions and descriptions of anorexia, may be triggering.
Seulki sighed as she looked at herself in the mirror. She had been back to her old habits of reading the comments from the little fans they had. She had just been introduced as their 8th and final member a few weeks ago and while most were supportive, there was always those who weren't. Reading things like she was fat, she needed to lose weight, her body wasn't the ideal type for an idol, plastic surgery would help even out her facial proportions, etc. She had even heard it from some of the staff. Her stylist had been nonchalantly talking to the other stylist and Seulki overheard her saying how she needs to always order a size larger to make sure that it would fit her. That she was constantly having to use more makeup than normal to cover her blemishes and acne scars. They hadn't known Seulki was still in the room.
She never said anything to anyone; choosing just to ignore it the best she could and continue on with her daily life. Until one day, their manager had paid her a visit at the dorm and said that her stylist had asked him to drop off some brochures on some of the best plastic surgeons in the country. That's when Seulki had decided enough was enough. She started working out excessively and practicing harder. She ate less and less, putting herself on a strict diet. She was losing weight, fast. Much too fast for her members liking. Her acne was clearing up because she had cut out all sugars and greasy foods; her stylist was complimenting her more on her skin tone and skinny waist. She also saw how much more positive feedback she was getting from the fans. She ignored the ones that seemed concerned, mentioning how they shouldn't be able to count the number of ribs she has or how much her collar bones stuck out. She felt better about herself, she was feeling amazing.
Jimin was the first to notice how quickly Seulki had lost weight, and drastically. He felt like he could play the xylophone with how much her ribs were showing. He hadn't been paying attention to the comments from fans and had no clue of the comments being made by the staff, and none of them had any clue that their manager had paid her a visit to give her plastic surgery brochures. He was worried about her sudden change in weight, but she was smiling and seemed happy so he didn't say anything; just keeping a watchful eye on her. When Taehyung and Hoseok had brought up one day how she looked unhealthily skinny, Jimin told them everything he'd been noticing. The trio opted to stay out of it and just hoped it would go away after they had made their comeback; but they were so terribly wrong. It got worse.
They most they ever saw Seulki eating or drinking was water. Occasionally a piece of fruit, but nothing else. She had become paler than normal, her hair was losing it's shine and her hazel eyes were sunken in. She looked tired, dark bags under her eyes and Hoseok had noticed she was becoming much more winded than usual during practices. He had had enough and was ready to let the rest of the members know one day while Seulki was out on her own schedule when a very angry Seokjin stomped into the room, yelling for everyone to join him immediately. He had been straightening up when he saw the corner of one of the brochures sticking out from under Seulki's pillow. Curiosity killed the cat and he pulled it out, becoming enraged when he saw it was for plastic surgery and that there was more than just one brochure.
"Who gave her this?!" Jin yelled at everyone, holding up the handful of colorful informational papers. Yoongi, Jungkook and Hoseok all clenched their jaws. Hoseok didn't know that they were trying to change her entirely. "Manager stopped by the other day. Maybe him." Taehyung said, fuming at the idea that their own manager was basically telling Seulki she wasn't enough. Finally, Jimin spoke up, telling his brothers what he had noticed the past few weeks. Taehyung and Hoseok also confirmed, but mentioned they were hoping it would stop after the comeback. "She's like a walking shell!" Yoongi yelled, pacing back and forth in front of the boys. "I haven't seen her eat a proper meal in a month. She's always practicing, always at the gym, always doing something!" He was angry at himself for not noticing sooner.
"What do we do, hyung?" Jungkook asked quietly, looking at Namjoon who hadn't said a word the entire time. His eyes were narrowed and staring at the floor. He was unclenching and clenching his fists and his jaw was locked up in a permanent scowl. "I'm going to talk to Bang. Jin-hyung, cook us a meal. A big one. This ends now." He stomped out of the dorm and Jin, with the help of Jungkook immediately got to work in the kitchen. By the time Seulki had come home, Jin had prepared enough food to feed everyone in the company. Seulki's mouth watered at the delicious smell, but she knew she couldn't have it. "You're eating with us." Hoseok said, lips pressed into a straight line. "I already ate, but thank you." Seulki said, bowing her head and trying to slip off towards her room when a calloused hand wrapped their fingers around her arm, stopping her. "No arguments. Sit." Yoongi demanded, eyes narrowed and nodding towards the chair in the kitchen.
Seulki obliged, feeling awkward as she could feel everyone's eyes on her. "Who told you to get plastic surgery?" Namjoon said, breaking the awkward silence. Seulki's eyes went wide and she averted her gaze to her overflowing plate. "I was just looking into it." She said quietly and Namjoon scoffed. "Wrong answer." She cringed at the harshness in his tone. "Manager-nim came by the other day. He said they were from my stylist." Her voice cracked a little. Yoongi slammed his hand on the table, standing up.
"You go tell manager he can go to hell and your stylist is fired."
