Namjoon and Seulki fluff
It had been 20 minutes since everyone had gone to bed after Seulki stomped away to her room. Namjoon was currently laying in bed, thoughts racing. Not only did they have a new album coming out fairly soon, one of his members was clearly hurting and he didn't know how to help. He already knew she would be livid because they were forcing her into a break; he could deal with that.
But not knowing how to help her mentally was killing him inside. He didn't understand why she couldn't see what they saw; what the world saw. He couldn't comprehend how they could write a whole album based on self-love and happiness and that she could just fake it the whole time without any of them ever noticing how much she was truly hurting. And that's probably what stressed him out the most. Was he really that busy that he hadn't noticed how bad she was hurting? Or had he noticed but his brain was to exhausted to put two and two together?
He sighed, rolling over and staring at the wall. What he knew she didn't know was how much this was all really affecting them as well. How, despite his anger, Jimin was ready to take her to the hospital, to rehab, to wherever if it meant that she would be okay. Taehyung was quiet and didn't tend to say much, but the minute she had collapsed, he was only 2 feet behind her until they ended for the day. Jungkook refused to let her drive in the car alone; sprinting towards it and making sure that he got in with her. Yoongi being angry was his way of caring and how he showed fear. Hoseok and Jin were silent but always watching with their eyes. Their eyes never left her.
Namjoon groaned quietly, listening to Taehyung's soft snores. Then he heard banging from the next room over. He sat up, listening intently. It was Seulki's room and it sounded like she was slamming drawers closed. He heard the door creak open and he quietly climbed out of bed, checking the time. 3AM. His anxiety picked up; was she leaving? About to murder them all? He shook his head, slipping on his sandals and throwing a hoodie over his torso quickly. Opening his door soundlessly, he saw her, with her hair up and workout clothes on tiptoeing towards the front door.
How he was able to follow her all the way back to company without her finding out was a mystery to him. And the fact that he hadn't knocked anything over or tripped over his own two feet. He watched from around the corner as she entered the gym BigHit had and frowned. He was mildly annoyed; she didn't need to work out and he thought that this was something having to do with her disorder. He quietly walked over, slipping into the room before the door closed and hiding behind some equipment, out of site.
She wrapped her hands, glaring at the punching bag in front of her. The corner of Namjoon's mouth quirked a little; he remembered when Jungkook had finally become comfortable with having a girl around and he taught her how to properly punch. His reasoning was in case there was anytime they weren't there, and she needed to "knock a bitch out." In turn, Seokjin scolded him for his language. There was a new fire in her eyes as she tightened her ponytail. She started punching the bag, having a rhythm down and Namjoon just observed. Until she started punching faster and harder, grunting and panting and finally falling down and breaking into tears.
Namjoon's heart broke; they had spent the whole time telling that she had no choice but to take a break from work, no choice but to start attending her sessions again, no choice but to have one of them scrutinizing her every move for the next few months that none of them had taken the time to talk to her. He didn't care if she'd be pissed about him following her, his legs automatically moving and carrying them to her, dropping to his knees and back hugging her.
She didn't flinch, didn't shy away, didn't push him away. She simply sank into his embrace, sobbing. She clutched his hoodie, twisting the fabric in her hands as if it was her lifeline. Namjoon tightened his hold, leaning his forehead on the top of her head, kissing it and mumbling into her hair. "I love you. . .I'm here for you. . .I've got you. . .I love you. . .I love you." She calmed, still sniffling and hiccupping, but calm enough to talk. She apologized, numerous times in her sobbing fit.
Namjoon adjusted them so he was cradling her like a baby and she leaned her head on his chest, still gripping his sweatshirt like it was the last thing she would ever feel. "I'm so sorry, oppa. I—I did this—I don't know why—I'm so sorry." She hiccuped in between sniffles. Namjoon kissed her forehead, gently rocking her back and forth. "I know, baby. I know. I'm going to help you. I want to help you. But I need you to want me to help you. I need you to want us to help you. Because, S, the next step is not being able to stay in the dorm, but in the hospital."
She sniffled, her hold tightening briefly. "And you know, I don't think you'd like having to wear scrubs everyday." He teased lightly and was happy when he heard a small laugh escape her. "Yeah. I don't think I'd like that. Unless I can bedazzle them." Namjoon chuckled, shaking his head. "I don't think that's allowed, love. But I'd sneak in whatever you needed just for you." Seulki laughed, lightly smacking his chest. "Sneak in just like you stealthily followed me here?" Namjoon narrowed his eyes at her. He thought he did well.
"Your slippers were flopping on the ground, Joon. Pick up your feet." He briefly glared at his sandals before tightening his hold and kissing the top of her head again. She took in a breath, burying herself deeper into him. Namjoon was her lifeline. He was always there to help her, to comfort her, to offer advice, and as much as it pissed her off, be bluntly honest when she needed to hear it. "I want help, oppa. I need help. But I'm scared. And ashamed. I don't want people finding out." Namjoon hummed, staying silent for a moment.
"You know I won't let them, right? And Kookie could kick anyone's ass who would try." She giggled a little, nodding her head in agreement. "It's alright to be scared," he said quietly, "but you have seven of us. Seven of us here to be scared with you. To fight this with you. And if that means we all need to take a break, then we all take a break. The album can wait; you're far more important." She sniffed again, his words making tears well back up in her eyes. Namjoon continued to gently rock them back and forth and she took another breath.
"Let's start tomorrow."
