The Aftermath of Callie and Arizona

The Calm Before the Storm Part II

Callie's POV:

I don't remember falling asleep last night, or maybe it was this morning, but I do remember waking up at 3 am to the sounds of rain. The lodge had a metal roof, so when the big rain drops would hit, they had a dampened, but tinier sound than the drops would have on our own roof in Seattle.

The drops were larger than normal, but it wasn't raining hard, more in an intermittent fashion. When the rain did slowly hit the roof, you could faintly hear the distinct sound of each drop register before the next drop sounded it's landing. As I laid there on my back, I knew I was listening to the start of a storm cell passing through and patiently waited to hear the volume and speed of the drops begin to increase.

I could also hear Arizona's breathing as the rain started ramping up. We had fallen asleep naked at some point late that night. Both of us were wrapped up in the top sheet and down comforter that was on our hotel bed. Arizona was sleeping on her back at this point, her hair was tussled from our rounds of sex, but still pulled back in a ponytail. Even though she seemed to be contentedly sleeping, I noticed her start to twitch a few times in the glow of the nightlight.

That's when my thoughts shifted and the large drops really started coming down fast. The rain was so loud, that it silenced the ever present waterfall noise for a good 10 seconds, before the waterfall found it's voice again and started to roar from the sound of it's rushing water.

"Noooo!!!"

As I listened to the rain, I was surprised to hear Arizona scream out in her sleep. As the noise of the storm continued to be our soundtrack, Arizona had started really twitching and appeared to be trying to fight back, even though she seemed to be invisibly tied down. Oh no, I knew what was probably happening... she was having a nightmare about one of her accidents, more than likely, the plane crash.

It all started after the crash, that Arizona began having violent nightmares when she would sleep. In fact, everyone that survived that crash had gone through the same type of nightmares. They all suffered badly from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, or PTSD, as a result of the crash and their week of survival in the woods. It was such an unfathomable experience, that their brains will never let go of. Over time, the occurrences of the nightmares had diminished for everyone, but they had never fully gone away for Arizona.

During Arizona's pregnancy, her mind had started combining both the car accident we were in together and the plane crash during her nightmares. It had made for some horrific dreams and terrible nights for Arizona that I'd always wished I could fix. Instead, all I could do, was to reassure her when they did happen and try to make her feel safe. Even though I can't do much, I am just grateful that she is alive and I still have her to take care of in good times and bad.

Arizona started "talking" again, but her speech sounded more like heated mumbling. Her whole body was now thrashing at moments, as if to fend something off. After 5 seconds, I realized she wasn't going to wake herself up anytime soon and fought the urge to wake her myself. I know that probably makes me sound like Arizona's cruel wife, but I learned after the crash why I shouldn't wake her from a nightmare.

Prior to the crash, I would wake my partners during their nightmares because I thought I was helping them by stopping it. Instead, I've learned that letting that person work through their episode on their own, is healthier. It gives their brain the ability to work through their fear and hopefully process that chunk of it. Plus, our brains are more likely to forget the episode if they are allowed to play out the dream and it can also help minimize the dream's waking effects.

After another 10 seconds, that actually felt more like minutes, Arizona finally woke up from her nightmare. As she was coming to, I gently said, "Sweetie, are you okay?"