Stardust Crusade (JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Fanfiction)

Chapter VII: Golden Boys Part III

Vegeta wakes up, screaming.

Vegeta: "THE CONSTITUTION'S FUCKED!!!
ADMIRAL, GET ME MY MONOGRAM!!!
Huh?"

The four are eating dinner silently in the desert.

Vegeta: "What the fuck?!
HEY!!! WHO STABBED ME?!!!
I'LL KILL Y-!!!!!!!!!!
Is that Tempura?
GIVE ME THAT!!!!"

Vegeta viciously ate like a wolf.

Jotaro, while Vegeta kept on eating: "Yare yare daze...
Don't eat or you'll...."

Vegeta chokes.

Jotaro: "...choke.
Goku... Heimlich Vegeta."

Goku: "Okay!"

Goku punches Vegeta in the neck, causing him to spit the shrimp out of his throat and fall to the ground.

Vegeta: "K-Ka!"

Vegeta vomits blood.

Jotaro: "Christ!"

Mob: "W-Whoa!"

Saitama: "Goku...
That's not how heimlich works."

Goku: "It is in our universe."

Vegeta, knocked out: "N-n~o it's not...
y~o~u fucktard..."

Saitama: "Wow... You got knocked out by that?
Geez... You really need to work out more."

Vegeta: "Fu~u~u~ck...
all of yo~o~o~u...."

The five eat a great banquet prepared by Prometheus.

Roasted Turkey, Chicken, Tempura, Wagyu Steak, Filet Mignon, Fries, Chips, Salmon, Salmon Sashimi, Sushi, Rice, and lot, and lots, of tea. Also some cream and sugar. The five enjoy a nice banquet.

Saitama: "Where's Prometheus?"

Mob: "He says he's not the banquet type of person. He likes to keep things quick, so he'd rather not join people during large meals."

Goku: "That's weird! I like being in large meals."

Vegeta: "That's because us Saiyans gorge foods in our mouths, dumbass"

Saitama: "What are Saiyans?"

Jotaro: "Saiyan, like Prometheus said, are a warrior race of-..."

Vegeta: "Excuse you, but it's best for the PRINCE OF ALL SAIYANS to explain.
Now, bald man, Saiyans are a warrior race of monkeys who once lived in Planet Sadal.
Then some dumbass blew up our red sun, so we were transferred to the glorious Planet Vegeta, with a yellow sun, where our race fought the veil Tuffles in order that we may keep our powers of the sun! Yellow sun made us stronger, by the way. HA HA HA HA HA!!!!"

Saitama: "Sounds like you just invaded an innocent race in a planet that didn't belong to you."

Vegeta: "Oh please, bald man, Lord Freeza was more evil than anyone could have ever imagined. I worked for that man for over 20 years. Then Kakarot killed him and I went to Earth and decided to... have a family."

He coughs, shrugging it off.

Vegeta: "Anyways, what of you, Bald Man?"

Saitama: "I did 100 pushups, 100 sit-ups, and a 10 kilometer run every day for the past three years. Then I became the strongest man alive."

Everyone remains quiet, staring at Saitama.

Vegeta: "Oh right...
Fuck you for that."

Mob: "Prometheus says his obsessions triggered his meta-gene, in the form of an X Gene. He says extreme stress turns you Mutant and extreme environments turn you into Mutates.
There are classes for our kind, apparently. I'm just a kid who developed psychic power when I was younger. It started when I started bending spoons as a toddler. Apparently something happened to me that let me gain the X Gene. How about you, Mr. Son?"