Memorising | Imagine

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Leon POV: 

I sigh as the rain batters the city, I don't mind the storms since I've come to learn that they pass soon enough, but it doesn't help that the rain smothers my hair to my face. I step into the restaurant, my eyes scan the room to look for the informant I'm meeting with, but my entire existence stops when I see the most beautiful- fuck that- stunning woman I've ever laid eyes on sitting at a table in the corner with another man. 

Jealously consumes me first, I know she's too good for him, I often told her that she was too good for me when we were together. But that was years ago, back when we were in love and happy, when I'd fall asleep with her in my arms and wake to find her arms wrapped around me, it was perfection and I was the happiest I've ever been. 

But then things went to shit. I got assigned to a case that was dangerous, it got personal and I had no choice but to push her away, but even then our relationship held strong, we couldn't stay away from each other, and I knew there was only one way to ensure she never got hurt by me or because of me. I worked with some government officials to fake my death.

I know it almost killed her, but I hurt more. I spent months debating if it was the right thing to do, but when there was an attack on our old apartment that would've killed her if she had been there, I knew I'd done the best thing. Still, I've hated myself everyday since for breaking her heart, but seeing here, like this, fuck I should be glad she's moving on and has a life.

But a part of me wishes it was me sitting with her. Eating out as usual before I took her home and we'd spend the evening watching movies and having slow sex on the couch. I love the way she'd look up at me, smiling as I touched her, her small gaps when I'd reach down and kiss her neck-

I've got to focus. I dip my head down and quickly head to the table where the informant sits. It takes minutes to go over the information, I nod and ask the right questions, but my attention is directed at the love of my life, just out of reach. Another lifetime, I tell myself. It still hurts more than any knife wound.

Once I've got what I need, I stand and mutter some form of goodbye. My eyes stray to Y/N one last time, memorising the way her eyes glisten as she smiles, before I turn and leave, forcing my legs down the street as my fists clench.


Y/N POV:

I smile at my friend, he talks about his boyfriend as I laugh and listen as best I can, but nowadays I'm not great at paying attention, especially when all my friends talk about their love lives and how their relationships are heading in the right direction. Honestly it makes my heart ache, but I shove the feelings down into a box and slam the lid shut.

I smile politely just as I look up, something pulls at me to look towards the door, and I swear the world stops turning. It can't be. There's no way. He's dead.

"Y/N, did you hear me?" My friend asks, his voice laced with concern. I nod but stand, holding up a finger for him to give me a sec. He frowns but nods, pulling out his phone as I rush towards the exit. I've got to be sure.

By the time I'm outside, rain soaks my hair and outfit, this storm is brutal but I don't mind, there's something about the rain that's refreshing. "Hey!" I call out to the blonde man walking down the near empty street, he doesn't stop and my legs are too short to catch up, but like hell I'm stopping if I'm right.

"Hey, excuse me!" I call out with more urgency, the man stops in his tracks but doesn't turn. By the time I reach him he's stood with his back to me, his head low, I notice his fists are clenched but I continue despite the tension.

"Leon?" I whisper just loud enough for him to hear, my hope bubbles up as tears fill my eyes. I swallow them back, my lip wobbles as the figure turns, confirming my outrageous suspicion.

"It's been a while." He murmurs, there's a playful edge to his tone but I know it's forced. I can't think, I just react.

I step forward as his arms open, but instead of hugging I swing my hand out and slap him across the cheek. His head turns as I pull back, bringing my hand to my chest as if to restrain myself. A few people pass, giving us odd looks but u don't care. "You fucking asshole, how could you!" I shout, my voice cracking as I sob.

Leon's face falls, understanding and hurt crosses his features as he nods, he doesn't rub the sting away, he just clenches his jaw and runs a hand through his hair. "I did what I had to, and I'd to it again. I'm so sorry."

"Sorry doesn't fix it Leon, I thought you were dead!" I snap, his eyes avert to the ground. I wrap my arms tighter around me, my body shakes from shock and the cold.

"I'm glad you've found someone, you deserve to be happy." Leon mumbles, finally looking down at me again. I huff and gesture down the street.

"He's my friend. My very gay friend. I've not gotten over you, I know I never will. Every damn day you're all I want, do you know how hard it is to live with the fact that the only thing you cherish most in the world is out of reach?"

Leon nods as his lips tilt into a painful smile, "More than you could know. Fuck, I still love you after all these years, my little force to be reckoned with."

I tense up at the old nickname, and it breaks down the rest of my poorly put up walls. I crumble as I throw my arms around him, and thankfully he squeezes me back, picking me up as I wrap my limbs around him, breathing him in as my head rests against his beating heart.

"It's alright, it's all gonna be okay." Leon coos, savoring me back. I let out a shaky breath as he sets me down. "We should talk about it."

I give him a pointed look as I grab his hand, it's like things haven't changed between us. I guess old habits die hard. "Yeah, we do. But if you even think about leaving me again, I'll kill you myself. I can't do that again."

Leon reaches out a hand and cups my cheek, kissing me like he's a starved man as I arch into his touch. 

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