Officer Shepherd✔️

hating you

DEREK

I got back from work and walked into the hotel room. We finally found the Killer and he's in the holding cell and I haven't seen him yet, but I will tomorrow. I walk inside and lock the door behind me. I walked inside and saw Meredith wasn't in the living room. I went into the bedroom area I walked in and saw she wasn't in there either.

I left the room and went into the kitchen. I walked into the kitchen and saw Meredith standing by the counter, her back facing me. I walked over to her and wrapped my arms around her waist. "Hi," I say as I kiss the side of her head.

she doesn't say anything. she turns around and wraps her arms around my neck, sobbing into my chest. "What the hell happened while I was gone?" I asked as I hugged her tightly. I rubbed my hand up and down her back and kissed her head.

"my mother called, apparently she heard what I do for a living and now she hates me!" she says. she sniffles as she pulls away and walks back to the counter. "I'm sure she doesn't hate you, you're a nurse, you're helping people. there's nothing wrong with that," I say.

"she doesn't care about that, she hates me," she says as she makes something to eat. "Meredith, you did nothing wrong," I say, putting my hands on her shoulders and rubbing up and down. "not to her!"
"Why does it matter so much what she thinks?" I ask softly. "because she's my mother! she's hated me my entire life!" she says turning around to look at me.

"My entire life I've tried being more like Lexie and tried to be more like Molly, and she still hates me! she always had and she always will and that will never change! I don't know what the hell I'm supposed to do anymore," she says crying as she storms out of the room. I follow her into the living room.

I walk into the room and see her sitting on the edge of the bed, crying into her hands. I walked over to the bed and sat down next to her. I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her into my chest. I'm sorry I acted like your mother hating you was nothing," I say kissing the top of her head.

"it's easy for you to say that, your mother loves you no matter what you do," she sobs, "I know, I'm sorry," I run my hand up her shirt and run my fingertips up and down her back until she calms down. "what did your mother say, did she indicate that she hates you or did she say the actual words?" I asked.

"I don't want to talk about it," she shakes her head. "I know, but talking about it makes it easier to live with," I say. "she said things that indicated it and then she said she hated me and that I could never do anything right, to begin with... I know she wants me to be more like my sisters but I don't what they do so much better than me anyway, not that I'm better than them," she says.

"I moved out before they did so saved more money, Lexie got pregnant when she was in high school, dated a horrible guy who stole from her and them, while when I was in high school I got straight A's and they didn't care once, it didn't bother them that she dropped out and failed when she was in school and Molly just a plain immature child and she always has been... I just don't know what to do anymore, I don't know what to do that would make them happy... I've done everything I can think of," she says while more years fall down her cheeks.

"There is nothing you can do," I tell her whilst running my fingers through her hair. "that's not helping," she says. "I know, but the reason you can't make them happy isn't that there's something wrong with you, after a week of living you made me happier than I ever have been... it's not you making them miserable, it's them that's making them miserable. they're not happy because that's the kind of people they are, it's not your fault, you're an amazing person... just stop talking to your mother so she won't keep bringing you down when you're happy again,"

"I don't talk to her that often anyway," she shrugs. "so she only calls when you're happy again to bring you down and then does it all over again...?" I say. "yeah, I guess," she shrugs. "I love you, but your mother sounds like a horrible person," I kiss her forehead.

"you're not wrong," she says. "can we have sex tomorrow?" she says after a bit of silence. "what?" I ask a bit surprised. "I had a weird feeling today so I looked it up and it said that it was horniness and then I wanted you and thinking about having sex with you makes the feeling in my stomach again, kind of like the other two times," she says as she plays with the fabric of my pants.

"You wanna have sex?" I ask, making sure I heard her correctly. "Yes, I trust you. It's not like you're going to do something without my permission or before I'm ready," she says.

"Okay, we can after work. Are you sure you're ready?" I ask, moving her so she's sitting on my lap so I can see her better. She has tear stains on her cheeks which means she was crying for a bit before I came home. I should have come home earlier.

"Yes, I think I'm ready," she nods smiling small as she looks at me. "Okay, but if you change your mind tomorrow we don't have to, you know that right?" I say.

"Yes, know. I'll tell you if I change my mind," she says as she lays the side of her head on my chest. "Okay... I love you, and I'm sorry about what happened with your mother," I say.

"Thank you, I love you too," she says. She lifts her head from my chest and placed her right hand on my cheek as she leans in and kisses me passionately.

Mers ready😏😏

Ellis Grey🤢