Derek was going to be taking Logan home today. Cristina said she was going to be taking Emily for a bit longer so he could get Logan settled in first.
Derek didn't know what he was going to tell Emily when he had the chance.
Meredith was the only family she had left... well the only good family she had left. Lexie wasn't the best sister in the world, Meredith made it clear that her younger sisters were the favourites and Meredith was the black sheep of the family... but even Lexie knew her parents weren't good parents.
Lexie must've known how horrible her parents were to Meredith because she most likely knew their parents played favorites and didn't want the same for her kids... but that would've been much easier has she raised her kids instead of having Meredith raise her niece and nephew... but then again her sisters never thought she would find someone that would want her to have his children.
but now Meredith had her own child... it was going to be hard to raise someone else's and her own.
Derek brought the carrier inside the hospital and brought it into Meredith's room. he placed it on the edge of the bed before going over to Meredith's side.
he gently lifted Logan up from Meredith's arm where he was peacefully asleep. but when Derek picked him he started to wail.
he laid Logan on his chest and gently patted his back as he walked around the room, trying to get him to calm down.
---
twenty minutes had passed and Logan was still crying. Derek couldn't seem to get him to stop and he didn't know what to do that would help.
the nurse the other day told him that if it felt like he couldn't do it anymore he should put the baby in a safe place and leave the room.
he placed Logan back next to Meredith and put her arm around him so he wouldn't fall. when Derek was about to leave the room Logan stopped crying.
he stopped at the door and turned around to see Logan cuddled up next to Meredith's side. all he wanted was his mother.
Derek sat back down in the chair and dropped his head down in his hands. he wasn't sure how he was going to take Logan home if he was going to cry for Meredith like he did before.
after a few minute, he got up and checked on Logan. he saw that he was still asleep. he checked his diaper.
he gently picked him up again and laid him down in his lap, changed his diaper. while Logan was still asleep he put him in the carrier and buckled him in.
he grabbed the diaper bag and tossed a blanket over Logan. he lifted up the diaper bag and the carrier. he placed the bag down on the bed before leaning over pressing a soft kiss to Meredith's forehead.
a tear fell from his cheek and picked up the diaper bag again. he left the room and left the hospital.
he placed the carrier on the seat and put the seatbelt around the car seat and in the slits over Logan. he took the small mirror out from the pocket on the back of the seat put it on the back of the seat so he could watch him while he was driving.
he closed the door and went around to the front, got in. he started the car and drove back to Meredith's apartment.
he and Meredith also hadn't talked about how they were going to live when she still lived in her apartment and he lived in his house... they practically lived together since he was always at Meredith's.
but even he thought his house was too small for them and two children, well not to small for them and two kids but it would be too small if they were going to have more kids and he didn't feel like it was a family house either.
he had planned to buy a larger house for them but it was becoming a little late for that. he had looked at a few house without telling Meredith, hoping to surprise her... but things took a different turn.
but he couldn't find a house that looked right for him, Meredith, Emily, Logan, and more kids in the future... if Meredith was going to wake up.
so he now decided he was going to build a house instead, one made specifically for them. one that was made for them and their children.
and even if Meredith wasn't going to wake up he still wanted a house that was nobody else had lived in. if Meredith's was going to die he wanted the house to be decorated with photos of her and he never wanted Logan to forget her and he didn't want her to be forgotten in his house.
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