Chapter 193

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She helped Ryan wipe his face today, making him feel insecure. It’s normal for him to feel jealous and concerned, but often when Ryan is mentioned, he also gets nervous.

She thought that after going through so much between them, he would understand that she no longer has feelings for Ryan. But he still doesn’t feel secure, not even a bit.

Holding James tightly, she heard her ask this and he weakly buried his chin in the nape of her neck.

“Because you loved Ryan, loved him like you love me…”

If it were someone else, James wouldn’t be scared or concerned, but Ryan is different.

“He attempted suicide for you, and he got depression. He loved you so much, I’m afraid…”

James took a deep breath, enduring the pain in his heart, and softly said:

“I’m afraid you’ll soften your heart and fall in love with him again…”

Just like back in Washington, when Ryan begged her to be with him. At that time, he was physically healthy and didn’t have depression, but she still softened her heart and agreed to be with him.

Now, Ryan has become what he was today because of her, so she should be more likely to soften her heart, right…

If she fell back in love with Ryan because of her soft heart, what should he do?

He knew he shouldn’t have such thoughts, but…

Amelia used to love Ryan so much, but then she stopped loving him, right?

He’s so scared that one day, she will stop loving him just like she stopped loving Ryan…

After understanding what James was worried about, Amelia lifted her hand and gently touched his thick black hair, her actions filled with pity and heartache.

“Honey, I no longer love Ryan, a long, long time ago when I kneeled and begged him, when his older brother pretended to be him and kicked me, and when I was lying in the hospital on the verge of death, at those times, all my love for Ryan had already been exhausted. I stopped loving him a long time ago, so how could I turn back…”

“After I let go of him, I slowly fell in love with you. Maybe you feel confused, why did I not only forgive you but also choose to be with you despite the misunderstanding. But giving up Ryan was because deep down in my heart, I always loved you. That’s why I chose you…”

“It’s just that between Ryan and me, it’s not just a simple first love relationship, but also a familial relationship where he worked and studied to help me pay for medical expenses and let me grow up healthy…”

“If he was just an ordinary ex-boyfriend, I wouldn’t care about whether he had depression or not, whether it was mild or severe. It’s because of this bond between us that after learning about his severe depression, I rushed to the capital to see him. Otherwise, there wouldn’t have been any connection between him and me in this lifetime.”

“Even though his disabilities and severe depression were caused by me, I won’t soften my heart and fall in love with him again. I only feel pity and guilt towards him. Even today, when I saw him, I treated him as a family member and patient, without thinking too much about it…”

Amelia finished speaking in one breath, looking out at the moonlight through the gap in the curtains.

“I swear to God, I will never love anyone else in this lifetime. except for you. If I do, let me die!” Her last words hit James’s heart like a thunderbolt, causing his heart to tremble uncontrollably. It seemed as if he could see the tragic scene of her death, and he held her tightly in fear.

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