4 mons later , nothing really has happen sense the very very wrong kiss .. I told Matt a few days later as we were alone again but at his house this time . Marissa ask me to go check on her son as Matt wasn't home and the sitter said he wouldn't stop crying . I went down there to find Ethan was running a slight fever and I think cutting some new teeth I gave him some baby Tylenol and rocked him to sleep the sitter had left when I got there and Matt rolled in 30 mins later .. marrissa was at her new job. . She don't get home til after Matt does. He gets home at 6pm she rolls in at about 8 or 9 pm .. most night we feed Matt and Ethan dinner .. I have to leave my house at 6:30 pm most nights ..when I work. But Jay has been. Complaining about me working more. He don't like it. He don't understand that I don't wanna work day shift to be away from McKenna . Or have someone other then him and I raise her .. he wants me at home at night. We have been fighting like crazy over everything. .. I think my job is just another easy target of his .. I've been having a hard time with the guilt too. I still feel like I cheated ..no I did cheat ! But Jay bitches about my job and I bitch about his. ..his trips to Jackson have become a weekly thing and he's home late ..I have to get Tammie to watch Kenna some nights .. which is totally fine. Cuz I keep Chloe a lot too. All us mom's work it out we all baby sit for each other . And I always have sissy. Which I've planned a pool party at zares house for sissy 6th birthday party! Next Saturday. I can't wait for that .. then we are having McKenna party in 4 mons.. the big 2 !!! I have narrowed it down to three places ..I just have to decided on one. ..I've got time .. back to Matt being home. ..he walked in I explained why I was the one with his son in my arms ..he says I'm absolutely certain my son is so very comfortable in ur arms ..I walk over to Ethan play pen and lay him down .I cover this beautiful baby boy up .and in turn to his evil father ... Matt no more .I'm serious. We can never ever go there again . Never . I love ur son..im good friends with ur wife .and I can't ..I just can't hurt them .or you. Matt says why didn't u mention ur married too or that u love ur husband. Huh? I look at him .Matt do not play games with me. .. Melanie I want to play games with u. He laughs .. I'm done I walk to the front door. Matt catches my arm . Hey I'm sry . I just can't not want you .. he says I think ... that was confusing. I must be looking at him confused. .je says I'll always want you. .. and sometimes I let that get the best of me .. I'm sry I'll never touch u again ..I look down at his hands on my arm .. he let's go immediately. I say Matt friends that's all.. he says yes ma'am. He says your still so sexy tho .I will just keep all the sex in my head .. he's laughing. . I push Kenna in her stroller home .. ugh. I walk in my front door get Kenna out her stroller and put her in her high chair .. I give her two toys . And I open the frig .. my phone rings .. it's Jay. I go off on him so hard that Kenna burst into tears ..and i have to lift and comfort my baby. I just hang up on Jay. He's headed to Nashville and isn't coming home till tomorrow. . This shit has got to stop !!! What game is this .. the roller-coaster is no longer fun I want off. I feed Kenna and sissy dinner ..I give them both a shower ..dress them both in warm Jammies put the character socks brush both of the hair and we sit and watch frozen. Twice ! I have sense changed McKenna room out it now has a twin bed in there for sissy .no toys I took out the guest room and made it a play room. So all toys in play room which Jay made so many cool feature in that play room and rick makes Kenna stuff all the time. His latest building project is a barbie dream house. .. with all wood furniture painted each piece all girly. Zares has been helping with the girly stuff.. McKenna bedroom has her crib and a twin bed .. a big dresser and her shoe rack built for a tiny shoe. . She owns 39 pairs of shoes so she needed one. .
