When I walk in the door of my house I see Jay sleeping on the couch .. I walk straight to Kenna room .. she's sleeping so good in her bed. Her room is a mess.. she must have played hard .. I kiss her face. .. I go the shower immediately ugh I smell like that dam sea food .. yuck. When I have gotten dressed I look at the clock it's 2 am . I need sleep. .
When I wake at 6:30am I'm in bed alone again. I go pee . Jay is in the shower .. I stare at him. I'm just lost on this whole Shana bit.. I'm not even gonna ask tho. Cuz for some reason the answer wouldn't bother me. I'm over his shit.. wow. We use to be so in love. And now it seems like I just don't care .. like I woke up and thought nope. I'm not gonna be his victim today. Or tomorrow. It's just that he attack me last time and I can't. As I'm feeding Kenna Jay walks over and kisses my forehead. . I don't respond . He walks around the kitchen like a preditor . He keeps staring at me but not so stupid as to say anything in front of Kenna ... he says are u off work today? I look up and say yes . He says what are yalls plans .. I say nothing today. We are gonna clean house and get all meals cooked for the rest of the week .. I'll be working for the next 4 days straight. . Jay says what hours? I say from 4pm till midnight. . He says oh OK . He's packing up his stuff for work .. I stand up clear the table and pick up Kenna. We are gonna start by cleaning her room. .. Jay walks in her room and says hey baby girl I gotta go to work now. .. Kenna runs to Jay he picks her up and kisses her face and is hugging her tight . She says daddy we go to the zoo this weekend. Member . She smiles ..he says yes baby girl I remember. . We will I promise. She's happy. .. he set her down and she is playing with her monkey .. he looks at me and says come here .. I walk over to him. He pulls me in his arms and hugs me tight. He whispers I love you. I say I love you too. But in the most monotone voice. He looks at me .. he says really ? I say Jay I'm wore out sry.. he kisses me a few times and walks out the door. I hear the front door shut . As soon as I see his truck pull out the drive way I throw clothes on me and Kenna and I run out to the car buckle her up and jump in. When I pull up at his office. . I sit in the back. I watch .. Jay is looking at some papers on the hood of Steve car. . They are blue prints I can tell.. Kenna says mommy we go see daddy .. I say not yet boo. She has her monkey playing. .. I see Shana walk up to Jay he immediately puts his hand on her back as he's still talking to Steve. . When Steve walked away Jay turns to Shana and kissed her cheek. She hugs him .. they talk while Jay is leaned up against the car ..Shana between his feet . He reaches for her ..but stops as he sees his dad walk up . Rick is not happy with Jay. I see Shana walk in the building. Jay watches her every move ..
When I pull back up to the house I see a strange car in my drive way .. I see a woman at my front door .. I sit there till she turns around. .. I leap out the car and hug marrissa and take Ethan from her. ..omg ..I cry immediately! I hug him so tight. I love him so much .. marrissa takes Kenna out the car.. we walk in the house . We sit down and we talk for hours as the kids play. We are having coffee and cake .. she tells me her and Matt haven't been together for a while .. she's been seeing a new guy. she says Matt hasn't been with anyone as far as she knows. .. but she can't be with him. They just weren't meant to be .. they live about 8 mims.. from each other. And about 45 mins. From me .. I tell her all about Jay and I ...she's in shock. ..wow Mel .I'm sry ..yeah me too. I've had it ruff . But I guess I deserve it . She looks at me no u don't. No one does. We just have to live it .. I say yeah.. and we wanted to be adults so bad .. Tammie walks threw the door with both kids looking great !! The girls are all dressed up and looking so cute. We all talk .. Tammie looks rested and happy. I say boo u look great ! She says I better I just spent a yrs. Salary on new clothes .. we laugh. Tammie says Sam hasn't been home for a few weeks .. I'm so sad they can't figure out there mess either . We all just need to get away from research men who want to have it all. The wife and kids and there whores... like Shana .
