I bend down in front of him ..Jay please look at me he says I really can't yet baby. . He's crying . Omg ..Jay I'm fine .I wanted u to ..I begged for it .I stand ..Jay I'm OK. I wanted it ! I walk to the kitchen and pour my self a shot .. dam I'm gonna need my good stash ..for this one ..I walk back in the living room Jay has laid back on the couch his head laid back I climb on his lap ..he's stop crying but his face is wet .. his eyes are wet .. dam .how did I break my man I just got home ... Jay please talk to me he looks at me . so down . Jay . Baby I promised you I wouldn't hurt you I never ever meant for these to be on you .. they look like I beat you ! God Melanie did anyone see these today .. the ladies at the spa ? I say yes . But I told them the truth that I loved every min. He leaned back . Baby this is NOT ok.. he says ..Jay yes they are . You did not hit me . He looks up baby I don't want those on you. Ur perfect .I want you to stay who you are ...and you wouldn't ever except these .. I Kiss him please take me to bed .I say ..he says baby I can't . I'm sry . I just ..can't. Jay ! I'm fine .I'm not upset about these . He looks like he wants to crawl in a ditch and cry ... I Kiss him and try my best to put him back in the mood. ...I have needs ... and seriously want him. He hugs me tight and says I'm sick over these baby. I swore to you I would never ever hurt u ..and these scream I hurt u bad .. he wants to cry and again .. Jay I'm going to bed come with me I stand up off him.. he says I should stay here .. I start crying . Jay please don't do this I'm fine. I begged you to do this . I wanted it .I wanted you to show me what it was all about. I cried when u said no . I made u . I'm fine. I like it Jay. I want to do it now .. I want to go to our other room .I need you to do this. I need it now. Why isn't when I want to u don't. What's this about. Really Jay. . He stands up and hugs me .. baby ssshhh. Baby ssshhh. I love you so much. Hey calm down. It's OK. I just can't lie to u. I don't want to do this to this point. No more bruises. Please baby the guilt of this is killing me. Baby he's looking at me in my eyes now. He says baby I'm sry. Please know that I would have stop if u said it hurt. I'd stop immediately. Just like I told you the first time I ever touched u. I said I'd stop if u wanted me too. And I told u in that room if u felt it's too much stop me. I'll stop. The first time we made love. I begged u to tell me to stop. You never say stop .. why ? I look up at him. Because I want you .. no matter the small amount of pain ..it's worth it to me. I don't want you to stop touching me. .. he pulls away. If u can't tell me I'm hurting you. How can I trust you. He says. . I'm in shock . Jay you can trust if it was more then i could handle I'd tell u. But some pain is not so bad .. I look away he says no its never OK to hurt you ever . I can't hurt u baby. . NO YOU CANT KEEP TREATING ME LIKE IM THE DAM VIRGIN U MET 4 YRS AGO !!! IM NOT HER .. AND WHY CANT I LIKE IT RUFF. WHY CANT YOU EXCEPT THAT I LOVE YOU .I'D DO ANYTHING YOU NEED ME TO DO !! He says because thats just it. Ur doing this because u think I need it. And I'll cheat if you can't fill that void.. I look up at him. He look like he's solved the big bang theory .Jay that's not true. I wanted to .. I like it . He says I don't need to do anything but be with you. It's fun sometimes to play hard .. but it's not something I'd have to do. I love , making love to you. And I want to now .. OMG. JAY YOU MAKE MY HEAD SPIN .. I SAY YES .AND YOU SAY NO . I GET MAD AND NOW YOU WANT TO...FUCK IT. JAY I GIVE UP . I REALLY DO ..IM SLEEPING ON THE FUCKING COUCH TONIGHT. CAN U FIGURE OUT WHATS EXCEPT ABLE IN OUR MARRIAGE SOON. PLEASE . I lay down on the couch and pull my blanket up on me .. he bends down on the floor behind me .. on his knees ..he wraps his hand around my belly ..
