I get it Jay I do. But I'm living in fear again. Like I did at home . He looks at me like I slapped him. Why are u so scared of me ? He ask as he steps closer to me again. Because you've hurt me .. I whisper .. he says not physically right .. I say not really. .. but u act like u will. . He said is that what tonight was about ? I say yes ... stop testing me ! Please . He says . Jay I'm sry but you have to stop testing me too. I say .. he says OK .. about 10 mons later Jay says come to bed with me it's 5am.. we need sleep. He walks to the living room and I crawl in bed . A few mins later he walks in our room. He turns off the light and shut and lock the door. .. I feel him crawl in bed behind me he pulls me to him and holds me . He's whispering in my ear as usual. Baby I'm sry I took things way to far tonight I did not mean to call u a whore. Ur not. I'm just not able to deal to we'll with all the guys that come on to u .. it makes me jealous and crazy. ..I'm sry . Please baby let's don't wake up mad .. I roll over to him. We can't see anything in this room is black .. but I tell Jay I'm sry too. And I hold him. I love you jay.. I love you too Melanie. We lay there in silence for a while ..I think is he a sleep ? I know he's not tho ..he's not making his signature rattle noise. .. it's been a while ..why aint he a sleep .. I look up at him knowing I can't see his face .but if I move he will ask u OK ? I know him .. he kisses me and says why are you still awake? I shrug .. he says baby we are OK now. I promise. You can go to sleep. I'm not going anywhere. I hold him tighter . Why didn't you fall asleep ? I ask .. he says because I have to watch you. And make sure ur not gonna make a run for it .. he holds me tight . Jay I'm not trying to make a run for it .. I say .. he starts rubbing my back. ..baby go to sleep. ..he whispers . I can't .i say . why not baby ? He ask. Because I just feel so idk.. he says what do u want Melanie. ... I say Idk. I roll over and lay on my belly. I just feel so restless .. I just wanna go clean house or run down the street . Idk. Just some thing. My mind will not slow down. Jay rubs my back and kisses the back of my head . He reaches down and pushes his fingers inside me .. he's so dam good at this. . Wow. He whispers is this what u need .. I shake my head yes I put my face in his chest and breath hard .. he says this is exactly what u wanted all along huh. . I shake my head yes. He's been doing this for a few minutes. . When he whispers don't .. I look up. ..he says don't cum yet . When u do ur gonna be out ..and I want you .. he rolls me over and he's on top of me and inside me .. I grab the sheet and squeeze it tight. He lifts my hand and puts it on him. He says show me how good it is. Not the sheet .. I grip him tight. .. he puts his face in my neck..he's saying something it's. A mumble to me. I ask him .what did u say. .. he shakes his head. No. ..I whisper what did u say. .. he pushes in Deep and says I said ur mine . All mine. He sounds sad .. yes I am I say .. he says I don't want u to leave me .. I know you think about it .. I say no I don't baby. He pushes in me again and says please don't .. I'm not gonna hurt u in anyway ever again I promise .. I shake my head yes.. he's moving a lot more rhythmic now that he's not talking. And it's so good. Like wow. He's so good. . I lean my head back and whimper .. he is done. But he's holding me so tight. I can't move .. he whispers ur turn .. I shake my head no. .he says you want to .. I shake my head no .. he says why baby. ..because I'm tired .. I whisper .. he says you will sleep better I promise. .I hug him tight. .. he says please baby please let me .. I shake my head yeah.. with in minutes I'm convulsing so hard ..it takes all the energy I have left .. I'm panting and whimpering so loud ..Jay says I love you so much baby. ..I just lay there ...I can't .. when I wake up the room is still black .. I feel like I've slept for days .....
