WhiteGXRoblox's Slice of Journal

26 August 2023

Feel like writing wattpad is becoming my main priority now. Oh well..

Since the day I moved into the city and the suite, I been writting alot. Since I'll be relying and living for myself. So there's alot of memorize and not forget. I got reminders all around my devices in case I forgets them, as well as noting my memories to recall whenever possible in this entire book.

What on earth... is this nightmare? Dreamt myself emotionlessly sexually assault on the innocent girl housemate I often talks to whenever she needs help. I woke up myself right after 10 seconds. I doubt myself and thought: "No. Why can I do that? I would never do such a thing!!" This. I will never forgive myself If I actually did, Like come on. She just turned 18 yesterday, Am I subconciously a pervert or weird guy? Did I play too much eroge video games? Even so, I never show these parts of myself outside the world... Everyone only see me as the nerdy introvert guy who only talks about stuff he passionate alot. It's great that I know I am self aware and control of myself. Let's just let go and not think about it too much for now

I woke at up 2pm. At which I stay up to 5am with a new gamer friend in GTA:Online with my introvert male housemate. Good thing is nothing emergency is going on so I can laze at bed as long as I want. But there's also stuff I want to do outside too than assignments and stuff let's get to it, Let's see.... Shopping lists.... Shaver, Milk, Snacks.

You know what, Let's be honest here. There are sometimes I... I....... I. have plan of buying Condom. No kidding no cap. But I didn't. Remember yourself White. You are 20 years old, you need to study and get a job before going out with someone. Yes, This is what I should be telling myself. On par with another fact that the girls I sometime talks to is suspected (to me) going out with someone, judging they seem to usually stick with others or talk with them happily more. Perhaps I am mistaken but It would be best If I leave them be and minding my own buisnesses. As long as everyone is happy, I should be happy for them. Right?

There are times I supress my own feelings and never show them them. In cases where I outright burst my hates and words I wanna say through internet without exposing my real Identity. Like what I am doing now. All these words, and stuff I wrote. Never, never show it to my real friend, not even my parents for them to read.

So on the outside I am just an average nerdy introvert who like gaming and talks alot about games.

Back to where was I, Time to head out to the nearby mall for arcade to claim that Fairlady Z Nismo on WMMT. and perhaps helping out the new players and other customers. And perhaps I should buy a discarded vehicle card off a veteran players......... (I wanna grind for Savanna RX-7 Turbo Se-limited)

Anyway, High chance my parents will be visiting me on 1, September, finally getting to meet them even though I moved here only last week. and my brother hopefully. And at next thursday I'll go out with Online friend to meet up in real life.

Am so Joyful today, Got a free discarded card from veteran player to start a good car. And today got Toyota Corrolla from scratch terminal then Claiming "Nismo Fairlady Z today". Later got 2 free play from random customer who left their seat unfinished gameplay for me to play. Of course I asked for anyone nearby if non regular want to play first.

I managed to save a veteran's story mode streak by shutting off the machine before the cards saves it (You Lose 77 wins streak). I immediately noticed and asked him is this on streak before shutting off the power. It was the same guy who gave me the discarded card so I would say we helped each other out.

2 Korean friend want to play the arcade machine but unable to buy card because of faulty self services machine. I helped and contacted the staff members and waiting for them check on it. For now I let them use my balance card to play it for RM20 (ofc they paid but i have to keep track of their usage or they use my balance in it) This is like the second time I contacted Staff in this fully service arcade run by CCTV.

Either way I made friend on the way. I would say alot of friends since I moved in this city.

- First is meeting up an online friend who were friend each other for almost 1 year and now we live in this city. 

- Second is that at other mall I met an introvert Malay that sometimes play the WMMT at OneUtama Mall then we friended on discord after me talking about the game to hmm. Turns out we have alot of games in common even TeknoParrot emulation for WMMT as well. 

- Third is In real life Hakone Rival  as a regular in one of the mall I usually go. We don't chat or do stuff together but we will always recognize each other and talk a bit.

 - Fourth is a foreign adult which I guess he is Germany or Amercian. He is new into playing the arcade WMMT game franchies and always old fans of it's original story and comics reader of the game. I take him as one of the new player where I give tips and explain the game mechanics to enjoy the game much more. and we talk sometime about the game through social media chats. This feels like the first friend with foreign people who isn't Chinese or Malays.

- Fifth is this who I met today. While I am returning back to my suite at 10pm. Noticed this person carrying vegetables and supplies with hands plastic bag and a backpack. His walking style seems tired. I catch up to his footsteps and offer him a Coffee cold drink. Feeling generous today so I gave away the drink and we have conversations together. Later he told me that he live by himself on the same lot as me. on other block though,  He worked as Archilogist-I-don't-know-to-pronounce. He's a malay about shorter than 170cm and I'm 172cm or around. either way we have quite a conversation then have a goodbye as we walk to our own blocks.

When I came back to the suite. Just as usual, Sees my housemates taking dinner and conversate with each other and I go back and dropped everything to write this wattpad. I would say, I have being blessed and happy today. Even though it's not about progressesion in studies or something and it's only about games. But still, I never felt this much joy in one day. It is worth that I did not regret moving into KL. Thanks to my parents though, I should really go back and visit them or give them calls regularly. Funny enough, me and my brother just speak humourously in english and talk about the Gran Turismo game we play on the same PS5.