Jennifer Jareau Imagines

You're Shaking ⚠️

⚠️ RAPE AND PANIC ATTACK ⚠️

Emily and I stood behind the window, watching JJ interview the serial rapist and murderer. I must've zoned out because by the time I looked back at Emily she was giving me a concerned look. "Are you ok?" She asked me.

"Yeah." I took a deep breath and gave her a small nod.

"Y/n?"

"I have to go." I left Emily and rushed to the bathroom as I felt the well known anxiety coarse through my body. "Shit shit shit." I leaned against the sink and squeezed my eyes shut. My hands were trembling and I knew how this went. I never knew how to stop it and I would end up on the floor with my whole body shaking. I clenched my hands together and slid down the wall.

"Y/n?" Emily knocked from the other side of the door. "What's going on? Are you ok?"

"Yeah."

"I'm getting JJ." Why the fuck was she getting JJ, she was in the middle of questioning our unsub. It didn't matter though because I could hear Emily's footsteps walking away.

"Honey?" JJ asked a few minutes later.

"Don't come in. I'm fine." I took a deep breath and tried to relax my body. I was mostly calm but my body was still trembling a little bit.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah." I stood up and waited for her to walk away so I could follow her out after a couple minutes.

"I'll be in the conference room."

A couple minutes passed so I went to the conference room. I didn't even look at JJ when I walked in, not wanting to meet her eyes. "Are you ok?" She asked me, moving over to my side of the table. I nodded and grabbed a file. "Honey, you're shaking." She took my hand and pushed the file away. My body tensed up at her touch but she didn't pull away. "What's wrong?" She lightly dragged her hand up my arm to my back, rubbing it comfortingly.

"It's nothing."

"It's obviously something."

"Well, it doesn't matter." I said the last part in a whisper as my voice broke from holding back tears.

"Yes it does." She tucked my hair behind my ear. "It does matter. I'm not going to force you to tell me anything, but I'm here if you ever want to talk about anything." I nodded and she kissed my cheek before moving back to the other side of the table. She reached across and grabbed a file.

"I was raped." I blurted. She immediately moved back to my side of the table. She grabbed my hands in hers.

"I'm so sorry that happened to you honey." She brought my hands up to her lips to kiss them. "How long ago?"

"A week."

"Do you know who did it?" I shook my head and a tear fell down my cheek. She wiped it away and gently grabbed my face in her hands, bringing it down to her chest so she could hold my head against it and hear her heartbeat, something that always calmed me down. "It's ok. You're safe now." She pulled me onto her lap so I'd be more comfortable.

We stayed like that for a good ten minutes before I pulled away. "Do you need anything?"

"I don't think so." I rested my forehead against hers.

"Just promise me you'll tell me if you need anything. I'm here for you." I smiled softly and put my arms around her.

"I promise."