Jennifer Jareau Imagines

No, You Were Perfect

"Baby it's 9:30 in the morning we should get up." I opened my eyes when I heard JJ's voice. I didn't say anything though, feeling too much like shit to move. "Honey?" I felt goosebumps crawl up my bare back as the cold air hit it. I smiled slightly as I remembered last nights activities but every piece of happiness got pulled away after a few seconds. "Baby?"

"What?" I sighed.

"Are you feeling alright?"

"I'm ok." She put her hand on my back and started tracing small shapes, knowing I loved it.

"You sure?" She moved closer to me and pressed a soft kiss on my naked shoulder. I didn't answer and she moved her entire body closer to me, draping her leg over her waist. The bare skin to skin contact helped calm me down, it was like the sweetest form of intimacy. "Was I a little too rough last night?" She asked gently.

"No. You were perfect." I said truthfully. I felt her smile against my shoulder.

"Then what's wrong?" She kissed my shoulder again, using her middle finger to draw even lines across my back. "Ok, you don't want to talk about it. Do you want to talk about something else? To take your mind off of whatever's bugging you?" I didn't answer but instead turned my head so I was facing her. She lifted her head up from my shoulder and stared into my eyes lovingly as our cheeks lied flat against the pillows.

I turned onto my side, causing her to take her hand back. I held my hand out, palm facing her. She touched our hands together so the fingertips were pressing against each other gently. When she started tracing the lines of my palm and then back up to my fingertips, our hands dancing together, I finally spoke. "I just feel heavy but empty at the same time." She continued to run her fingers lightly over my palm. "One of those feelings where...if you knew you were going to feel like it forever, you wouldn't want to live." She laced our fingers together, looked back into my eyes and frowned.

"Have you been feeling like that a lot lately?" She asked, genuinely interested in my answer. It made me feel a bit better, knowing that someone cared.

"Not constantly...around every other week." I admitted. "I'm really tired." She reached up to touch my face, tracing all the lines of it while her eyes wandered over it adoringly. "What are you doing?"

"I love you." She whispered.

"I love you too." She connected our lips in a soft kiss after I replied and gently pushed me onto my back. She started to kiss down my jawline and down my neck, slowly and lovingly, not sexual at all. She kissed over my chest and then down to my stomach. I laced our hands together again and couldn't do anything but gaze into her eyes once she kissed back up to my lips. Her face was centimeters apart from mine. I wasn't trying to make any expression but I could tell from the way she was looking at me that I just looked sad. "I'm sorry." She shook her head.

"Don't be." She got back onto her side and I did too. She ran her fingertips over my arm, watching as goosebumps formed. I just stared at her face. I put my arm over her body and shuffled closer to her so my head could fit in the spot under her chin. I kissed her collarbone and caressed her back. She pulled my leg over her waist and stroked my hair. "We can stay like this all day if you want, it's ok." I nodded.

"I really want to." I kissed her collarbone again and closed my eyes. "Thank you for this Jayje."

"Anytime."