Razorblade Romance (Ville Valo Fanfic)

67. Deep Shadows

We had only one day left in Croatia. I woke up and fortunately I didn't have a hangover. Ville was still sleeping, he usually slept more than me.

I sat on the bed, thinking about yesterday. I didn't change my mind now I was fully sober, but what about Ville? I was trying not to grow expectations, but it was difficult. I was already planning how I would work and go to the lab, how I would speak to Dr.Virtanen about it and her reaction. I imagined Henrik happy for me. Oh god, I would see my parents in two days. My mom will go crazy.

We would leave tonight for Helsinki, pack our bags as we had a small luggage, and then go to Brazil.

This time I wouldn't wait, I wanted to do a pharmacy test, then later I could make a blood exam. I knew there was a pharmacy nearby, I saw Ville in deep sleep, so I changed myself and went there.

I asked for one that had informations in English, I knew they were pretty the same everywhere in the world, but I couldn't have any doubts. My stomach was twisting of anxiety.

I returned to our room and Ville woke up with the door closing. "Where were you?" He mumbled. I went to the bed, and kissed his back, as he was laid face down. He smiled sweetly, without opening his eyes.

"I went to the pharmacy nearby." He opened his eyes, rubbing them, and sat on the bed. "Why?"

"Ville, do you remember everything that happened last night?"

"Yes. I didn't drink that much, but enough to make a mess, I remember."

"Did you change your mind?"

"Not at all. Did you?" He had the most worried look in his eyes that even hurt me. "No, love. I went to buy this." And showed him the pregnancy test. He examined it and took a deep breath. "Right. Wanna do this... Now?"

"I guess. Later I can do a blood test so we are sure. Tomorrow, in Helsinki."

"Okay." Ville opened the box, a bit sloppy. I giggled. "Let me. You'll just have to wait, anyway." I knew how it work but I read the instructions anyway. My hands were shaking a bit. That would change everything, our routine, our jobs, our lives, our world.

I got up to the bathroom and Ville followed me. "Oh, just wait a bit, V." I giggled. "I'll be right back."

"I'm sorry, okay." He smiled shyly. "Wait." He pulled me closer. "No matter the result, we are prepared, right?"

"Yes. I hope so."

I went to the bathroom and followed the instructions. It would show two red lines if I was pregnant, it would take only three minutes to show. I returned to the bedroom and sat by Ville, glancing at the clock. He was bitting his nails. "Now we have to wait three minutes."

Ville nodded. "I can't even look at it. Oh lord." He was nervous, covering his face. I was, too. My stomach was burning, my heart was pounding so strong in my chest, my hands were shaking. The longest three minutes of our lives.

Ville held my other hand and grabbed the test. He put it on the bed, face down. "When it's time we'll look at it." I nodded. "Are you okay? Your hands are sweating and you're shaking."

"I know." I let a tear escape. "I'm so nervous, and terrified. After all that happened to us. And we didn't plan it."

"I know. But we are stronger than ever, kulta. We will deal with whatever the result is."

"I do know that. Eu te amo." Ville smiled so sweetly when he heard me say it in Portuguese, and caressed my face. Ville got up and took his asthma medicine. He smiled to me, but he was as nervous as I was.